Spooktacular Sixteen
by The Last Riddle
Summary: Halloween is here. Steph has been charged with investigating who's stealing bodies at the new funeral home. With help from her cast of crazy friends, will she crack the case and make it to the ball with Batman? Relaxed Babe, Morelli friendly.
1. Chapter 1

**Halloween is the best holiday ever invented by the human imagination. Christmas is warm and joyful, Thanksgiving is full of amazing food and love and Valentine's Day just makes you look at the person you're with and feel all those sparks all over again. Yeah, right. Christmas is usually full of fighting, Thanksgiving is just plain stressful and fattening and don't get me started on the horrible trap of pain and despair known as Valentine's Day. Halloween shouldn't be called a holiday. It is so much more.**

**It is a month just made for mystery and scary stories. The leaves are changing, the air is crisp and the tourists, if Jersey had any, are gone. Change is in the air and you should know from experience that the change isn't a good thing, but it always make you hopeful. You want to be surprised and scared. You want mystery. You want that feeling that anything is possible. Vampires stalk at night, werewolves prowl on a full moon and ghosts still haunt the houses where they met their horrible end. But most of all the month of October ends in a celebration where people can be anyone they want.**

**That drab secretary you see everyday is actually a Mistress of the Night and you better obey. The well mannered office boy who is so prompt with your mail is a monstrous werewolf in disguise, who would have thought? And that police officer that lives down the street? Yeah, he's really the most notorious mobster of all time, dressed to the nines in a zoot suit and fedora.**

**I was always too imaginative, according to my mom. I dreamed big…and sometimes gory. I loved October and Halloween. In fact, I loved it so much that I would dress up for it on any holiday that my mom didn't stop me before hand. I have been a vampress, Mr. Hyde (I actually convinced Valerie to be Dr. Jekyll) and a dead soldier, battle wounds included. I was once a robot and I have even tried to be the Sultan of a small country. **

**I loved pretending. I loved the freedom of being in a disguise. And more than anything, I loved that for one night I really was the Queen of the Undead or mummy straight out of Egypt. My mother was fit to be tied with me. **

**And she still is. Just for many more reasons.**

**For one thing, I am a bounty hunter. In more polite society, they now use the term Fugitive Apprehension Agent. Same difference. I'm a skip tracer. I find people that the cops can't. It sounds pretty bad ass, doesn't it? Its really more about just knowing your turf and understanding how people think. I have good instincts and even better friends that always seem to be willing to assist in my insanity. Unfortunately, I also have a tendency to get into situations that no one could possibly imagine. **

**There is an entire betting pool at the local precinct devoted to my cars. Yup, that's your tax dollars hard at work. **

**The man who taught me how to survive this mess I call a job is Ricardo Carlos Manoso. Street name, Ranger. He is the resident sex god and probably the one man in the city that scares the hell out most of the criminals. He's mysterious, he's dangerous and right now, he is incredibly good for my health. He has a constant stream of mouthwatering cars that have all the cops sure that he is doing something very illegal, but naturally there is no proof. Ranger actually owns a company, Rangeman (Ranger Manoso, get it? Yeah, it took me a while, too) that he keeps on the DL. It would ruin his street cred if everyone knew that he didn't sleep on a dirt floor and eat sticks for breakfast. In fact, his only listed address is a vacant lot. **

**And for the last five months, he has been my boyfriend. That's really just a technical term. I have no idea what most would call us but it isn't like any other relationship I have ever been included in. It's killing my mother that neither of us are looking for a cream wedding (after all, it just wouldn't be proper for a divorcee to wear white! Gasp!) or children for that matter. Hey, I've seen how exhausted my sister is. I just don't feel the need to procreate. I'm not 'burg and I love it.**

**The 'burg is officially labeled Chambersburg and it is a small town smack dab in the middle of Trenton, New Jersey. Yep, the state of attitude and landfills. The 'burg isn't just a place, it's a way of life. The 'burg is getting married fresh out of high school, popping out half a dozen kids before you're thirty then guilting them for the rest of their lives. The men work hard and the women keep house. Women stand by their men no matter what or who their doing and they are expected to cook a mean coffee cake. Change doesn't happen often in the 'burg.**

**My name is Stephanie Michelle Plum and as my sometimes live in lover tells me, I thrive by not doing what is expected of me. I went to college instead of getting knocked up. I finally caved and got married, then quickly divorced when I found my soon-to-be ex-husband playing doctor with that skank Joyce Barnhart on my ruined dining room table. I blackmailed my pervert for a cousin Vinnie into a bounty hunter job instead of the obvious choice of the button factory after I got laid off at EE Martins. I befriend my skips on a regular basis and two of my best friends are, respectfully, a gay street lawyer and a former 'ho. Honestly, I see nothing on that list that is unusual but that's probably the part that has my mother tippling more often than she should and ironing the drapes.**

**This morning started with me rolling out of my empty bed (my bedmate wakes up hours earlier than me) and slipping into my shower. Showering is kind of an addiction for me. It's relaxing, cleansing and the perfect environment to think in. What's not to love? And best of all, you smell better getting out than when you stepped out. I did the bathroom stuff and found my usual uniform of jeans and a t-shirt. Throwing on a pair of Doc Martins, I was ready to go. The October morning was gorgeous and I was cheerful until I walked to my parking place and found my car missing. Well, crap. I flipped out my cell phone and punched in a number.**

"**Andrew Carson's office, how can assist you?" The polite and bored voice of Deedra, Andy's office assistant, greeted me.**

"**Yo, Deedra. Is Andy in?" Deedra is a veteran of the streets. At twenty-one, she has seen stuff that could turn an average person's hair white. She is a former prostitute and an old skip and damn protective of her boss. He helped me befriend her and he won her heart over. I'm pretty sure that she would kill for him and there is no doubt that she would die for him.**

"**Oh, yeah, hang on a sec though, Steph, he's on the phone with the mayor." Andy had started his own law practice to help the poor and homeless about five months ago and he was a busy cookie. He could get shit done and he did it in a way that people thought it was their idea all along. He had three centers being planned out right now and half a dozen shelters being converted. The boy could move mountains and he was only twenty five. Give him a few years and he could rule the world. He's also my upstairs neighbor, so it comes in handy. "Something wrong, girl?" I sighed and told her maybe.**

"**Oh, he's off. Talk to you later, chica." I heard a click.**

"**Hey, sis, what's up?" When we met, we hit it off and I told him that he felt like the brother my parents cheated me out of. We got kidnapped together by a dirty cop in a Darth Vader suit and to calm one of our fellow captives, he explained that we were Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia and we were going to kick butt. Ever since, he has called me sis as a private joke. **

"**Hey, was my car in the lot this morning?"**

"**Um, yeah. It was parked next to my car."**

"**Positive?"**

"**Yeah, I almost scratched the door pulling out. Why?"**

"**Because it's gone now."**

"**Damn."**

"**Yeah."**

"**I left around six this morning."**

"**I guess I had better call Mia."**

"**Good luck with that. She hates when you get in jams." We signed off. He was improving rapidly with his phone manners. I started to dial Mia's number but I speed dialed one first.**

"**Yo."**

"**Yo yourself. I've got a problem."**

"**Yeah?"**

"**My car is missing."**

"**Missing?"**

"**As in, not in the lot and I didn't move it."**

"**Only you, babe. Need a ride?"**

"**Nah, I'll Mia to give me a ride when I file my report."**

"**I'll bring dinner."**

"**Pino's?"**

"**I was thinking Indian."**

"**Great, bring on the curry. See you tonight."**

**Mia was less than thrilled to hear my cheerful good morning,**

"**What happened?"**

"**Why does something have to have happened?"**

"**Because we have a date for shopping on Saturday. You wouldn't have called unless something had happened and something always happens." **

"**My car is missing."**

"**As in it went out and you didn't want it to or it just got kidnapped?" I rolled my eyes at the mommy analogy.**

"**As in, my car isn't where I left it and as you just pointed out, shit happens to me." She sighed. **

"**I'll be right over."**


	2. Chapter 2

"You piss anyone off lately?" Detective Mia Brookline asked me as we drove to the local precinct in her police-issue Crown Vic. I had originally met her when her name was Nicole Burch and she was my best friend at age eight. She left my life after a year and for the last twenty years I thought she was dead. She came back to Trenton about eight months ago and she has been annoying me as my friend for the last five. She's also seeing my ex-boyfriend, Joe Morelli, with my strong approval.

"Not that I know of."

"Anyone suspicious hanging around? You know, besides your Latino boy toy?" She didn't care for Ranger, mostly because it was her job but she tells me that she's a little protective of me as a sister-type.

"Nope." She rolled her eyes at the lack of my response. We pulled into the cop shop lot and she rubbed her forehead with the tips of her fingers. "Hey, c'mon, it's not so bad." I said gently, touching her shoulder.

"Your car just got stolen." She pointed out.

"It could have blown up."

"How is this better?"

"Because there's hope. There's always hope."

XxXxXxXxX

Mia dropped me off at the office, with the donuts that I made her overly healthy butt stop to get.

"Morning, ladies." I breeze in, plopping that box of hard earned goodness on the desk.

"It's after one, Steph." Connie pointed out, typing something on the computer.

"Nah, it's always morning in Steph-land." It's nice to have friends that understand. Lula is a former 'ho and one of my closest friends. We share souls but not clothing styles. Her clothes range in the tight, bright and wildly screaming type and today, she was in true form. Electric spandex mini skirt topped by a sequined top, hair and nails dyed to match.

"Got anything for me, Connie?" I asked as I lounged next to Lula, savoring my first donut of the day.

"Yeah, two. Ones a pretty high bond, but I thought you could handle a twelve year old kid." I took them from her.

"What did he do?"

"She, actually." I flipped open the first folder to a girl named Mallory Benedict. She looked like what I always thought a Mallory would. Red hair, freckles, thick glasses. Cute kid, except the scowl.

"What did she do? Steal a lolipop?" Lula asked, looking over my shoulder.

"Close. Cars. She's a car thief." My jaw dropped.

"You're kidding."

Connie shook her head. "She is involved in a chop shop ring."

"Holy smokes."

"Girl, she lives pretty close to you, doesn't she?" I look at the address and she did infact live in the Hamilton Township, in an apartment complex a block from me. I groaned.

"My car just got stolen this morning."

"She is a bad girl." I nodded, swallowing. I opened the second file.

"Marcus Wright. 32. Interesting fellow. He's deaf and evidently he got charged with assaulting an officer because he was signing threats and some pretty nasty insults at the arresting officer. He didn't know that the officer could understand what he was signing."

"What was he getting arrested for?"

"Traffic violation. He hasn't paid his speeding tickets for a long time and he drives fast a lot."

I closed the folder, noting that Marcus also lived in Hamilton.

"I could use some help with Miss Mallory the car thief and I don't have wheels. You want to ride?" I turned to Lula.

"Let's do this shit."


	3. Chapter 3

Before we went off chasing skips and being hardcore, we stopped for Burger King and regrouped. Hey, don't shake your head at me, we have to plan. While we munched Jr. Whoppers and those little pie slices that are way to good to be real food, I flipped through Mallory's file. I really didn't see anything useful. She didn't have a record and she was arrested redhanded with a Lexus.

The kid stole a Lexus.

Hunh.

She was 5'2'' which is pretty good for a twelve year old. I think. I don't really have a growth chart handy. Anyway, nothing much in the file.

We pulled up outside and I studied the building. It was squat, ugly and three stories. Mallory lived with her mom on the first floor. There seemed to be an unfenced backyard out back that Lula thought was cute for a modern urban apartment building. We swung out and walked in. The Benedict's lived in the rear apartments. A worn looking woman answered my knock and I turned on my best grin.

"Hi, I'm here to see Mallory. Is she here?" The woman looked at me for a moment without answering then yelled over her shoulder to Mallory.

"Mallory! Some lady is here to see you!"

"Who is it?"

"I don't know. Get your butt out here!" She left us at the door. The redheaded trouble maker walked out and looked at us skeptically.

"Hi, Mallory. My name is Stephanie Plum. You missed your court date-" That was all I got to say before the kid launched herself away, toward the back door. Lula and I chased. When we ran through the kitchen, she flung a carton of eggs at me and hit her target. I was running, I was mad and now, I was covered in eggs. Beautiful.

We burst through the back door, Mallory leading. She scrambled for a car parked in the back yard and managed to start it before we made it out the door. She flew out of the alley, skidded left onto the street and disappeared. We both stopped slack jawed.

"Was that your-?"

"Yeah."

That was my car. The twerp evaded recapture with my car.

XxXxXxXxX

When I knocked on my second skip's door, my hand almost stuck to it. Did you know eggs get sticky as they dry? Yeah, imagine what they are doing to my hair.

A really good looking guy answered the door. I mean, really, really good looking. It wasn't the kind of good looks that came from genetics really. It was more like he was confident and fit and that made him sexy. Whatever it was, it made Lula and I stare. His eyes paused on Lula for a moment. I guess seeing a big, black woman incased in that bight of blue isn't something you see everyday. Then, his eyes moved to me. They moved over the egg whites in my hair and down the egg yoke running down my face.

He leaned against the door with his arms crossed and get this, he looked amused. Well, jeez. Anyway…

"Hello, my name is Steph-" He distracted me by staring at my lips. I licked them and he looked up to my eyes, waiting. Okay, then. "Er, my name is Stephanie Plum." Again, he stared at my lips, totally throwing me off what I was saying.

"Yes?" His accent was slightly flat but kind of pleasant, too. I shook my head and tried again.

"You missed your court date and I need to take you in and get you rebonded. Why are you staring at my lips?" His eyes slid back up to mine. Then, he made a show of checking out my body, like he had the hots for me. He moved closer, acting all suave. Behind me, I heard Lula squeak. He leaned close.

"Because, I'm reading your lips." He leaned back looking smug, then he turned and went back into his apartment. I did a face palm. Right, the guy is deaf. What was I thinking? He had left his door open and I could see him inside gathering things up. He snapped his fingers and a chocolate lab sat at his feet. He grab a leash and snapped it on. The dog and man moved together into the hallway and he locked the door.

"Ready?" He turned to our shocked faces and led the way out. Lula and I exchanged looks. That was different.

XxXxXxXxX

We didn't get out of the police station until four because Vinnie drug his feet getting there. Look, I know you think we stayed because the guy was freaking hot, but that's not it. Look, I'm not going to leave a deaf guy at a police station when he doesn't have anyone else in the city to come and get him. Of course, the fact that he was more competent then Lula and me made it kinda silly for us to worry about him. But nevertheless, he was pretty good company.

He fell into a game with me that he would point out the passing person's most prominent feature, then teach me the sign for it. On a few, he's blatant honesty cracked me up. The cops were glad to get rid of us when Vinnie finally showed.

I gave Marcus my cell number in case he needed anything, then I got embarrassed because I had forgotten that he was deaf.

"Oh, jeez. You probably don't use a phone." He laughed and pulled out a Blackberry.

"The wonders of modern technology." He winked at my embarrassment and took his Lab inside.

* * *

I still don't own the Plum-verse. I'm still not JE.


	4. Chapter 4

I walked into my apartment, dropping my keys and purse by the door. I smelled something amazing coming from the kitchen and followed my nose. Ranger was moving around in the kitchen, looking surprisingly domestic as he put groceries away. It felt like a tiger pretending to be a house cat. Well, tigers are pets too right? Jasmine had one. Yeah, right. And a crocodile is just like a dog, but with more teeth. I leaned against the wall and watched him move.

"Hungry, babe?" I looked up and met his dark eyes. I suddenly got some mental images of things that had little to do with food. Focus, focus. My head started to itch. Right, the eggs.

"I need a shower." I waved to him and trudged down the hall. I could just feel him smirking at my back. I grabbed some clothes to change into and quickly slipped out of my stiff clothes. My scalp was seriously itching by now and my skin felt tight and crusty. Ugh, I hate raw eggs. Throw me some nice hard boiled ones and I would be good to go but freaking raw eggs? Ugh, I scratched at my head. It was a relief to shower and I spent a long time in there. When I got out, I grabbed my brush and pulled on my comfy clothes. I was still brushing my sopping wet hair when I went back to the kitchen.

Ranger was making a salad to go with the chicken curry and rice. Somehow I doubt that salad is authentic Indian cuisine but I ignored the details. Ranger liked salad. I figured let him have his salad.

The mail was sitting on the counter beside him. I randomly flipped through it, counting the bills and not paying much attention to them when I got to the bottom and found an unusual envelope. My name and address were embossed in silver on the front of the cream colored front. It was actually beautiful by itself. I traced the writing with my forefinger. It was postmarked from Pennsylvania, which made me frown. I didn't know anybody in Penn state. At least, not this well. I was assuming that it was a wedding invitation. I flipped it over to open. On the little triangle flap, the address was printed. No name. I carefully tore into it.

Ranger's attention became focused on me. I read the little note inside and frowned. "Something wrong, babe?"

"Its an invitation. To a ball." He raised an eyebrow and looked down at it.

"A ball?"

"Uh huh. A masquerade on Halloween night. Halloween is next Friday." I felt the excitement wash through me. I looked up at Ranger with my eyes shining. "Wanna be my date?" He kissed me and handed me a bowl of spicy curry.

"Wouldn't miss it."

XxXxXxX

We sat on the couch in our usual style, my legs draped across his lap. I had just finished telling him about my day.

"I can't believe her! Who steals cars in their spare time at age twelve? Why isn't she in school?"

"So what are you going to do?"

"I'm going to get my car back." I frowned and looked at the muted TV. The news was flashing on the screen. "Maybe the chop shop?" I shrugged. I'm seriously hoping that he has an idea where to find it. He just nodded. I stared at him, waiting for him to realize that I wasn't a superhero.

"I've heard that things are going on down Nelson." He supplied after a pause. Nelson Avenue was a stone's throw from Stark. It wasn't my favorite place in the world, but I could cope.

"West?" He nodded. West was much worse. Beautiful.

"I have a big takedown tomorrow. Dawes. How about I send one of the guys to back you up?"

"The more, the merrier." He kissed me gently. He had been trying to get Dawes for a week. The guy was originally arrested for child rape but he killed a couple of cops when he was making an escape. Jail inmates usually didn't treat baby rapers kindly. Ranger had actually been hired by the sheriff's office to take the man down.

I stretched and grabbed my laptop to check my email, falling back onto the couch next to Ranger.

"Uh oh, babe."

I looked over at him. Ranger was watching the silent news, totally focused. I turned and watched, trying to figure out what had his attention. There was a high speed chase on the turnpike. I reached for the remote and turned it up.

"And the police have confirmed that this is the escaped inmate Jack Finney. For those of you just tuning in, Jack Finney, an escapee from Morningside Mental Institution, has stolen a car and has so far lead the police fifteen miles in a high speed chase." The talking heads then went into how dangerous this was and they gave the likelihood of a fatal ending. My cell started buzzing.

"Hey."

"Hey, have you seen the news?" Andy's worried voice came through the line.

"The car chase?"

"Yeah, don't you know who that is?"

"Jack Finney? No, never heard of him."

"About ten years ago, his daughter called the police and told them that she was sure that her father had killed someone because she found a body in his bedroom when she stopped by to take care of him. The police conducted a search and found dozens of bodies in his basement. He had been stealing them from the funeral home he worked for years. They sent him to Morningside and get this, he is still denying his guilt after ten years. I'd say the guy's pretty unstable."

"Cripes. How do you know all this? You're from Chicago."

"It happened about thirty miles from where my grandparents live in New York." We sat and watched the chase for a few more minutes. Jack Finney's car suddenly swerved off the turnpike on an exit for Trenton. The car missed the road and flew into a ditch. By the time the police converge onto the car, it was empty.

"So, there's a body snatcher on the loose." I murmured to Andy and Ranger.

* * *

I still own nothing, except my OCs. Just a side note, Jack Finney was the author of the novel _The Body Snatchers_, which was turned into Sci Fi classic _Invasion of the Body Snatchers._ However, the body snatchers were actually aliens and the bodies were still alive.


	5. Chapter 5

It was still dark when I woke up in Ranger's arms. His watch alarm was screaming.

"Five more minutes." I muttered, rolling into Ranger's chest to block out the noise.

He laughed and kissed my head. "Go back to sleep. It's early." Then my bed warmer left the bed.

"How early?" I stretched and yawned.

"Four. We have to get there before Dawes starts moving." He went into the bathroom and I heard the shower start. About five minutes later, it stopped. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. That is not a shower. He got ready in the bathroom with the door slightly open. It was a quirky habit of his, I had noticed. It was as if subconsciously, he didn't want to be alone.

He moved back into the room and started putting his gear on. I caught his hand and he looked at me. "Please, be careful." I whispered. He looked at me for a long moment then caught my lips in an intense kiss.

"I'll see you tonight, babe." He kissed me one last time before going to meet the guys. That was his way of reassuring me, because Batman didn't lie.

I tried to go back to sleep, but it was no use. I crawled out of bed and padded to the kitchen to make a pot of coffee. While I was waiting, I told Rex all my worries. He wiggled his butt in his soup can to show that he understood. I dropped a couple of grapes in for him and grabbed my coffee cup, moving into the living room. I sank into the couch and turned on the ever-reliable Ghostbusters.

About halfway through it, Andy knocked on my door. He got his own coffee and joined me on the couch. When Peter Venkmen was talking to the floating Dana, Andy sighed. I gave him a look.

"I hate being single."

"That bad?" I didn't ask what a floating Sigourney Weaver had to do with his lack of love life. That's just how Andy's mind worked.

"I hate being alone."

"You're twenty five. You have a job that you love helping people. You are good looking. Why do you need a guy?" He grinned when I said he was good looking. I swear it's strange to see a guy like him not be confident in his own body. Maybe he is just too smart for his own good.

"Maybe I need a guy, sis. I want someone to share my life with." I asked if he just needed another Derek, someone to worship him. He shook his head and smiled sadly. "I remember this song. The lyrics hit me, 'I want a man that stands by me, not in front of me or behind me.' I want what you have with Ranger." I tilted my head and thought about the words. Yeah, that could definitely be Ranger.

"You just have to have patience. If you want something too desperately, you'll never get it." He smiled and tousled my hair.

"I've got to get to work. You need a ride anywhere?"

"Nah," I shook my head. "I'll just ride with the guy Ranger sends over." Andy paused on his way out.

"You think any of his guys are single?" He sent me a look that made me laugh.

"I'll ask around for you."

"Don't you dare."

XxXxXxX

I opened my door at 9:30 to Lester Sanchez.

"So you're the one who drew the short straw." He grinned and shook his head.

"Nah, I volunteered." He laughed at my crazy look. "Hey, I got to sleep in."

I grabbed my jacket and purse and followed Lester out.

I had originally met Lester on one of Ranger's "redecorating" jobs. I had naturally assumed that we would be redecorating someone's house and I dressed the part. Turns out when Ranger says redecorating, he means evicting junkies. Who knew? Lester seemed to have joke for everything. He was a smaller guy, compared to most of Ranger's men, with a wiry build and indeterminable racial background.

We loaded up into his black pickup and I directed him to the bond office.

The girls both stopped what they were doing when we walked in, but their drool session wasn't as long as it was when Ranger showed up. Hey, he's Ranger. Nuff said.

"Hey, guys." I dropped Marcus's body slip on the desk and flip through the file Connie handed me while I waited for the check.

"Girl, what are you doing up this early?"

"Getting my car back."

"Hell, yes! I'm there." When Lula said this, Lester shot me a look that clearly said no way. I ignored it.

"Steph, it is a chop shop…" Connie pointed out.

"Yeah?"

"You might not have a car left."

"If those suckers busted her car apart, then we'll just shoot them."

"Steph." Lester muttered looking at me. Lula was going over his dead body.

"She has a gun." I pointed out to him,

"That's what I'm worried about." He said as went outside.

XxXxXxX

Nelson Street is a pretty desolate place. The three of us parked the truck a few blocks from the garage and entered the derelict apartment building across the street from it. Lester paused at the door to the apartment that would look directly into the upper windows of the shop.

"Well, you going to break it down or what?" Lula asked, getting psyched to see a guy bust in a door.

He raised an eyebrow and twisted the knob. The door swung open.

"Oh. Yeah, that works, too."

I led the way into the room and looked into the windows, squinting to see anything. Lester silently handed me a pair of binoculars. See, men can come in handy. I gasped when I saw my car or what was left anyway. The frame was still standing but the wheels were missing and the engine block was empty. Those creeps do fast work. I handed the binoculars to Lula.

"Shit. Let's go kick some ass." I stopped her with my hand. I had a better plan then getting killed. I pulled out my cell and punched in Brookline's number.

"Hey, cupcake." Joe picked up. I check my phone to make sure I hadn't accidentally dialed him.

"Joe, give that to me!" I heard Mia giggle in the background.

"Yo, Joe."

"What's up?"

"Just busting a car theft ring. You?"

"Holding my girlfriend down." Eww.

"Actually, I need your girlfriend to do the bust."

"Will she be home in time for dinner?" I checked my watch.

"Should be." I chirp.

"I'll let her know, then."

"Joe!" Mia shouted at him. I heard an oof and then Mia grabbing the phone.

"When and where, Steph?"

XxXxXxX

I checked my cell phone as the last of the guys from the garage were being loaded up. I had two voice messages. One from Grandma asking if I was coming to lunch and one from Andy telling me to pick a place to eat. Let's kill two birds…

Andy picked me up at 11:30 and we made our way through the 'burg to my parent's house. As we were walking up the sidewalk, I noticed that he was limping slightly.

"What happened?" I gestured to his leg. He looked embarrassed.

"A, uh, client kicked me."

"What?"

"Yeah, a street bum who needed his veteran benefits and the government was withholding. I told him that they could take up to a week to refile the paperwork and he got mad." He shrugged. Just another occupational hazard. My cars get blown up, he gets kicked.

Grandma met us at the door to show off the new Halloween earrings. Hmm…skeletons in bikinis. Excellent burial choice. You see, Grandma Mazur was the perfect 'burg wife when I was growing up. She made a terrific coffee cake, her house was spotless and her children moved on to further the 'burg movement. When my Grandpa Mazur when to the Barbeque in the Sky, Grandma Mazur moved in with my parents. It was like she just got tired of the 'burg and became her own person over night.

She wears clothes intended for a woman in her twenties and she has the sex life of a man in his twenties. Guns fascinate her and thongs are the thing of gods. Hey, I couldn't make this stuff up. Dad is ready to bury her in the backyard and he doesn't seem to care if she's still breathing when that happens. Mom sighs a lot, takes sips from the kitchen cabinet, and generally tries to ignore her mother's antics. Grandma's a free spirit, who am I to judge?

"Stephanie," My mother came out of the kitchen and gave me a quick hug. She nodded to Andy, who went to sit and watch TV with my dad. Dad liked Andy. I have a feeling that we both think he should have been my brother. Mom, on the other hand, didn't really care for him. As a good Catholic, she didn't like his sexual preference, but she put up with him because he never flaunted it in front of her. However, Grandma…Well, let's just say, she considered it interesting dinner conversation. "Stephanie, could you take your grandmother to a showing tonight?"

"Oh, yeah, there's a pip of one at that new funeral home. You remember Eddie Calhoun? Well, he died on the pot. I really want to see how they did his face." Mom crossed herself and looked at me. Well? I sighed.

"I can't. I have Tae Kwon Do tonight." Again, mom crossed herself. What is bad about Tae Kwon Do? It's actually very relaxing. About five months ago, I found a list I had written to myself after I was sure Nicole was dead of things that as a ten year old, I thought needed to be lived. Learn Tae Kwon Do was the first one that I had started working on. Andy and Lula signed up with me for classes.

"I can take her." Andy said from the living room.

"Oh, would you?" My mother asked, obviously trying to figure out which would be worse- Grandma going alone or Grandma going with Andy.

"Sure, going to class with my leg hurting like this probably wouldn't be a good idea." He totally missed me gesturing with my hand slicing across my neck.

"Oh, how sweet of you, Andy!" Grandma squealed. The poor boy didn't know what he was getting into.


	6. Chapter 6

After a quick and very filling lunch, Andy volunteered to take me to the used car lot and help me pick out the next victim. When we were scoping out the cars, my phone buzzed. I picked up without looking at the number.

"Yo."

"Yo? What kind of answer is that for a chick?" Marcus replied after a pause.

"The kind that's a bounty hunter for a living."

"Ah, yes. Who am I to question you? I'm just part of the scum that you have to drag into jail." He chuckled a little.

"There have definitely been worse scum."

"I'm honored. I actually needed a favor. Would you mind?"

"No prob, what do you need?" It occurred to me a moment too late that it might be a teensy bit foolish to say that to a perfect stranger.

"A ride? To the impound lot?" I laughed. He sounded like a child ready to beg. "I'll take that as a yes?"

"Uh, hang on." I leaned toward Andy. "Would you mind taking someone to the impound lot?"

"Nope. Who?"

"One of my skips." I pulled the phone back to my mouth. "We'll be there in five."

XxXxXxX

Marcus and Star, the chocolate Labrador, were lounging outside waiting for us. When Marcus saw me in the car, he stood and dropped his cigarette to the ground, stepping on it. He loaded Star in the back and followed her in. I turned around so he could see my lips and I enunciated as much as I could.

"Marcus Wright, this is Andy Carson." Marcus said a quick hello and settled back in the seat, looking out the window. Andy's jaw tightened and he briefly nodded. What was that? Andy was the friendly one. He was a people person. It was his job. But it seemed like he didn't like Marcus. He would look in the rearview mirror at him every so often and the look on his face was not friendly. He looked almost mad. I glanced back at Marcus to make sure he was still looking out the window, then I whispered to Andy.

"What's your problem?" He just shook his head. After that, the three of us rode in silence except when I would point out directions to the impound. When we arrived, Marcus jumped out and headed to the office. He smiled at me on the way by. Andy and I were slower to get out.

"You know him well?" Andy asked.

"No, he was one of my skips yesterday."

"And he needed you to give him a ride? Who hangs out with the person who took them back to jail?"

"You did." I pointed out cheekily.

"Why you?" He asked again. His voice keeping the same low pitch.

"He just moved here." Andy looked like he was about to say, likely story or something like that but held his tongue this time. That was him too after all.

"Where from?"

"LA, I think." Andy just nodded to this, as if to say, I thought so. I was about to ask what his problem was again, but Marcus came out of the little shed following the officer on duty. He had to sign one more thing and we walked closer to him. His car was about a hundred yards behind him, in a line of cars. I looked it over. It actually looked like a car built for speed. My eyes were on it when all of a sudden, it blew up. Then, the car next to it. The heat from the two fires blew up the third car.

"Go, Steph!" Andy shouted and shoved me back a little. I ran a little ways back then looked over my shoulder. Another car blew up and Andy grabbed Marcus's arm and started pulling him away. Marcus fought him a little because he didn't understand what was going on. Andy pointed behind him and Marcus turned in time to see the next car explode. The line of fire was coming very close, very fast. More cars behind the line of explosive cars started blowing up. The two guys and the impound officer caught up with me and we ran out of the gates and into the streets. We stood in awe as one after another, the impounded cars blew sky high, then fell back to earth. Out of my peripheral, I saw a streak of red going over the fence a little ways down the line. I focused my eyes on it and I made out Mallory Benedict.

"Jesus, that girl is insane."

XxXxXxX

"I can't believe it, Steph! Blowing up your car is one thing, but the entire impound lot?" Eddie Gazarra asked incredulously. Eddie has been a friend since elementary school. Before I got serious with Joe, Eddie would bring beer over and we would watch hockey together. He was a great guy, who just happened to marry my idiot cousin, Shirley the Whiner. I guess he liked her because they had three kids that he was always trying to rope me into babysitting.

"It wasn't my fault!" He shook his head. "Seriously, I saw one of my skips jumping the fence after the first few cars."

"Which one?" He asked, flipping open his notebook.

"Mallory Benedict." He frowned, trying to remember the familiar name.

"A twelve year old? The preteen car thief blew up the impound lot?"

"That's what I saw." Eddie turned to Marcus who was leaning on Andy's car in between Andy and me.

"You see anything?" Marcus was looking at me and he hadn't seen what Eddie had said. I was about to tell him, when Andy tapped his shoulder, drawing his attention.

He pointed at Eddie and enunciated. "He asked you if you saw anything?" Andy pointed to his eyes on the word saw and at the end wiggled his index up and down. Marcus nodded and turned to face Eddie.

"I was a little busy watching cars blow up. I didn't see anything else." His tone was dry and a touch sarcastic. Eddie nodded and Marcus went to sit in Andy's car with Star.

"My ASL is a little rusty." Andy admitted softly, looking at Marcus.

"You knew someone that was deaf." Andy hesitated for a moment, then nodded.

"Yeah, for a while growing up. I was an only child and my parents aren't close with either of their families, but Father was still on good terms with his brother. When Uncle Mason and Aunt Diane were killed in a car accident, their only remaining child came to live with us. We all tried to make it easier on her and learned sign language to help her out. She was a great girl, a couple of years older than me. I adored her. She had been born deaf and I guess it was all to much for her. You see, she had a hard time connecting to people because she had to have a lot of faith in them before she became close.

"I don't think she ever attached to us and high school became too much for her. My parents were pretty wealthy and they sent her to the same prep school I went to, instead of a school for the deaf. It was the beginning of a new school year while we were in high school when I came home to find her." He stopped.

"What happened?"

"She slit her wrists in warm bathwater."

"Oh, god, Andy. I'm so sorry." I whispered and he looked at me with tears in his eyes. I reached up and hugged him tightly. He hesitated before wrapping his arms around me. We stood like that for a while then we seemed to remember Marcus in the car. As we pulled apart, I looked at the car. Marcus was watching us. He nodded his head toward Andy, asking if he was okay. I nodded. I think he would be.

"Is that why you were so cold to Marcus?" Andy gave me an unreadable look.

"I didn't know he was deaf until the cars started blowing up."

XxXxXxX

Andy took us to the car lot to look at cars. Marcus wondered off to another section of the lot, leaving us to look for mine.

"Your dad told me to make sure you buy American."

"Naturally."

"Ooh, how about this one?"

"Um, too male?" I said when he went to a Hummer. "Oh, I love this!" I walked to a green Corvette. Andy shot me a look.

"With the money you make?"

"Buzz kill."

"How about this one?" He walked to a black Dodge Colt. It was a nice car. Compact. It was about 14 years old with under a hundred thousand miles. Plus, it would accelerate like a muscle car and fly.

"This is it."

XxXxXxX

The three of us parted at the car lot. Andy seemed warmer toward Marcus, but something about it sent up red flags for me.

Marcus had found a Jeep Wrangler that he seemed to love. He waved to us as he cruised away.

Andy and I went back to our separate apartments to get ready for our very different nights. I warned him to make Grandma leave the crowbar in the car and to make sure he stayed by her side. She could be a tricky one.

I got dressed in the Tae Kwon Do uniform. It looked like a bath robe with pants. I made sure to tie the belt properly and evenly. The little things mattered in the dojo. Lula called to see if I needed a ride. I told her that I would pick her up. I wanted to show off my new baby.

We learned something very fast in Tae Kwon Do, patience is a must. If you expect to become a master fighter over night, then you were going to be terribly disappointed. It was very repetitive. Kick, kick, kick, kick. Punch, kick, punch, kick. You learn it until it is a subconscious motion, which is the point. Ironically, I've noticed that since I've started learning how to fight, I have fewer reasons to fight. Not many of my skips mess with me now that I have confidence in my body.

But there is always that one.

The dojo master greeted his class for the night and we bowed low to him, until he acknowledged us. We started by doing knuckle pushups, which were a real pain in the butt. He led us through some warm up things, then started the lessons. See, in the dojo, everyone trains together. You have black belts down to white belts. The people are arranged so they are amongst their own colored belt.

In every discipline the belts are different, but in our dojo they went from: white (pure soul), yellow (souring up to the sun), blue (sky), green (life), brown (returning to the earth), red (these were the most dangerous, because they had the knowledge of a black belt, but not the patience or experience) and black belt (knowledgeable teacher). Lula was a blue belt and I had just earned my green belt. Tae Kwon Do was a tournament sport and it was usually required, but since we used our learning in our daily lives (umm, not quite, but hey, tournaments are scary) we got a break from them.

We did our warm down, both relieved that the work out was over and regretful that we were about to leave the peace of the dojo. The twenty students bowed to the master and Lula and I left the dojo, sweaty and relaxed. The street was quiet and the air was crisp. I dropped Lula off and drove home to Ranger.

He was sitting on the couch with a beer, watching baseball. Must have been a violent day otherwise he would be watching the Ranger's game. I grabbed a beer and dropped down beside him. He kissed me.

"That uniform is sexy on you." I laughed and we settled into the game. On a commercial, I asked him how the take down went.

"Good. We surprised the creep. He tried to take Tank down, but Tank was…well, Tank was Tank." We laughed. "How did your day go?" He asked softly watching me.

"Oh, just took down the chop shop ring and blew up the impound lot, nothing big." I got the rare and breathtaking 200 Watt grin.

"The impound lot, babe?"

"It wasn't my fault! It was Mallory." He just nodded. Was he the only person in the city that believed me?

"She's probably mad that you took down the chop shop. No doubt that she was making good money off it." I nod. My cell started buzzing on the coffee table. It was Andy's number.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Stephanie! Someone kidnapped Eddie Calhoun!" Grandma shouted. Oh, boy.


	7. Chapter 7

* * *

Grandma and Andy stayed at the apartment until nearly midnight. She just went on and on about what kind of sicko would kidnap a dead man. At one point both Ranger and Andy looked at me, but none of us had the heart to tell her it wasn't kidnapping if the person was dead. Grandma Mazur was always up for some good gossip and she loved excitement at the funeral home showings, but it seemed that stealing the body crossed her line. It was probably one of her greatest fears. She turned to me.

"Stephanie, you're a detective. You have to find Eddie. You'll do that for me, won't you?" It was midnight, I was exhausted and honestly, I was tired of hearing about it. I know, I'm going to burn in hell but I think all three of us would have promised Grandma the moon just to get her to go home. I nodded. She beamed at me and took my hand.

"And you," She said turning to Ranger. "You always help my Stephanie. You will help her, right?" His blank face was fully in place, probably to hide his sleepiness, but possibly, to hide how much he wanted to send her to a far away Third world country. He nodded.

She started to turn to Andy but he beat her. "Of course, we will all do everything we can to stop this…madman." Ranger lifted his eyebrow at this. Madman? But Andy continued. "This is an awful thing, but I think you need to go home and get some rest, Grandma. You know everyone's going to come to you to find out what happened and you don't want to look tired for that, now do you?" She smiled, completely won over by his BS. I looked him over. Hunh. How did he do that?

"You are a sweet boy, Andy. I hope you find a nice man to settle down with." She turned to me. "I need to use the little girl's room before I go home." I nodded. As she got up, she turned to Ranger. "To think, I wasted my brand new outfit. I hoped to pick up some nice stud tonight." She shook her head and toddled to the bathroom. Ranger rested his head on his arms and shook it.

"I think the worst part about tonight was getting hit on by that creepy assistant." Andy did a full body shiver. "He made Igor look like a babe."

"What was his name?"

"Don or Dillon, something like that."

"I'm ready to go, sugar!" Grandma called in a chirpy, sweet voice. Andy got up, shaking his head. Hey, it's his own fault. He volunteered.

XxXxXxX

Ranger and I slept in the next morning. I love being lazy with Ranger. He's warm and cuddly and hey, he's hot, you know? I can't help it. It's those Hungarian genes. I woke up and stretched. With a kiss, I asked what the time was.

"8:03." Hunh. That's early. I guess, I'm living on Ranger time. "What are you doing today?"

"Hmm…I have new skip that I haven't really looked at and I need to look for Mallory. Maybe drop in and see the girls. You?"

"I've got to do some busts. Vinnie asked me to drop in and talk to him about some changes he wanted to make." He shrugged. "I don't know what that's about."

"You turn him on."

"Ugh." He rolled away from me with his arm across his eyes. I giggled. I loved getting a reaction out of the master of control. His cell rang and I slipped out of bed to shower. He watched while he spoke to the phone, obviously wanting to join me. Another time, bat boy. I gave him a finger wave and he gave me a dirty look as I walked away.

When I got out of the bathroom, he was in the kitchen munching some toast. I jumped up on the counter and he moved closer. Kissing up my neck to my mouth, I moaned and pulled away. Something occurred to me that had been on my mind. I pulled him closer and kissed him a little to butter him up.

"Ranger," I kissed his throat.

"Mm, yeah?"

"Why," I moved to the other side, "did you pull away so much with me before we got together?" I pulled back and looked him in his dark eyes. "If you are an opportunist, why not take the opportunity?"

He kissed me hard. "Because, when I made you mine, I wasn't going to share." I gulped. Oh, boy. He gave me one last kiss.

"Got to go, babe." He grabbed the last piece of toast and pulled on his leather jacket. I may see him everyday, but I never get use to how easy on the eyes he was. He smirked and walked out the door.

XxXxXxX

I decided to go to the office first, just to check the gossip. Maybe someone knew something on the funeral home theft or the redheaded walking disaster.

"Hey, girl."

"Ooh, Steph! Thank god, you brought donuts. I was craving like a banshee." I set the box down between the starving women. It was nice to be needed, even if it was just for a sugar fix. I plopped down and the girls froze with their donuts halfway in their mouths. Now, there was only one man in the city that could induce an orgasm on sight alone. Three guesses, anyone?

"Babe," Ranger nodded to me. "Ladies." And walked into the little weasel's office, shutting the door behind him. Both women gasped simultaneously. Tank stood in the office, waiting for Ranger. Tank was a big, black guy that made Ranger look like a chatterbox. The first time I worked with him, I saw him throw I guy out a three story window. Fun times with Tank.

"Hey, girl, did you get an invitation to a ball recently?" I nodded.

"Oh, me too!" Connie burst out. "It said the crème de la crème would be there."

"You have a date?" I asked Connie. She deflated a little.

"Not yet."

"Hey, big guy!" Lula said to Tank. He turned his head a fraction toward her. "You got a date on Halloween?"

"No, ma'am." He said softly.

"You want one?"

"Yes, ma'am." He smiled slightly at her brashness.

"Good, pick me up at six."

"Yes, ma'am." He drew out he words and had the biggest grin on his face. Ranger stepped quickly out of Vinnie's office and saw Tank's dopey grin. Then he looked at me. What broke Tank? His look asked. I mouthed, 'later.' He nodded slightly.

"Tank." Ranger nodded to all of us and led Tank out.

* * *

A/N: I know that by this point, JE has already gotten Tank and Lula together, but since I'm already revising some of her stuff, why not try my hand at this couple? I think they are sweet.


	8. Chapter 8

**My new skip was a bit of a nasty case. I sat in my car flipping through the file. His name was Jerome Baker. He was arrested for assault and disorderly conduct. Whatever that meant. It was kind of a catchall term. Turns out Jerome is a mean drunk and unfortunately, for his little woman, he is always drunk. **

**He lived on Cranston Street, right in the center of the 'burg. It sounded like he could rival the Morelli men for being no good and rotten. I drove over to his house and found a beautifully kept single story house with the famous and rare picket fence. The hedges were all in line and the windows were simply gleaming. This woman was 'burg to the core. She had probably never even considered leaving the bastard when he started hitting her. After all, it was her wifely duties. I shook my head and swung out of the car. **

**After a quick knock, the woman in question opened the door. **

"**Yes, can I help you?" She said, barely above a whisper. Her eye was marred by a big bruise and her lip was slightly swollen. I gave quick mental thanks to the men currently in my life. Thank god, my dad had never done something like to my mom.**

"**Yes, my name is Stephanie Plum. Jerome Baker missed his court date and I need to take him in to be rebonded." If Vinnie rebonds him, I will sick Harry the Hammer on him.**

"**Oh, no. I'm sorry but you can't do that."**

"**Oh?"**

"**Yes, you see, he had a tough day yesterday and he got home late. He needs his sleep." She looked so terrified. I felt sympathy ripple through my stomach. Tough cookies, honey. You have to help yourself here. No one is going to make him stop hurting you if you don't help yourself.**

"**Uh huh. Well, I need to see him today."**

"**That's just not possible." She whispered furiously. She jumped when someone roared in the back of the house. Seriously, he roars. I caught sight of the big man as he moved toward the door. He was very big.**

"**What the hell, woman? Can't you keep it down when you are doing your damn hen gathering shit?" Charming man. I stepped into the house in front of Mrs. Baker.**

"**Jerome Baker? I'm afraid you missed your court date and I'm going to have to take your ass to jail."**

"**The hell you are!" He stepped closer and I pushed the terrified woman back. He threw back his arm to take me out and I sidestepped when he swung so that he was off balance. **

**I circled to keep his wife out of the fight, naturally falling into the fighting pose that I had practiced so much. He turned and lunged at me, ready to clobber me. **

**I again sidestepped and he smashed into the wall, groaning as he pulled back. He growled at me and again came at me, swinging. I decided to finish this before Mrs. Baker somehow got involved. **

**The next time he swung, I ducked my head to the right and grabbed his wrist with my left hand. I jammed my right hand into his elbow at the same time I gripped his wrist, yanking his arm back and up. He screamed in pain and dropped to his knees, as I continued to press his arm. **

**I leaned down and murmured, "Now, you're going to come with me nice and quiet, got it?" He whimpered. "Say yes, or I'll break your arm right here in front of your lovely wife."**

"**Yes." He whimpered. **

"**Good." I released him and cuffed him. I followed the now quiet man. Looking back over my shoulder, I saw Mrs. Baker's shock and amazement. I smiled, maybe that taught her something. Women were not punching bags.**


	9. Chapter 9

There was another viewing tonight. I offered to go along with Grandma Mazur to check out the new funeral home. I know, don't volunteer. Well, Andy needs a break and I'm not going to throw Ranger in with all those crazy, old ladies. I have to find out who is kidnapping dead bodies.

I came home after dropping Jerome Baker off. He was such an ass. About half way to the police station, he forgot his lesson and started kicking the seat and trying to open the back door with his hands cuffed behind his back, all while shouting at me. I calmly reached back and zapped his ass. Yeah, yeah, I know. Turning over a new, non-violent, kick ass leaf. Well, he's an ass and I need to work on my calm skills. I'm not Ranger here. Besides, as I zapped him, I thought about what this cretin did on a regular basis to the woman he had vowed to protect and cherish for the rest of his life. I don't like bullies, okay?

I showered and pulled on my "nice and normal" look. A pair of black pants and a white, button up the front blouse. I may not be 'burg and my Grandmother may not care, but I am not wearing a miniskirt to a funeral home. I put on the minimum amount of make up and fixed my hair a little. It was a curly mess. I have accepted this, but that doesn't stop me from trying to fix it every chance I get. I gave up and figured what the hell? It's a just a showing.

Ranger was in the kitchen, when I finally got out of the bathroom. I kissed him quickly as I walked past him to the fridge. I grabbed a couple of grapes for Rex and a beer for me.

"Drinking this early?" He sounded amused.

"I have to deal with Grandma Mazur and half the crazy old women of the 'burg for the next couple of hours all while trying to solve the mystery of who's stealing dead bodies. Trust me, I need this." He tilted his head back and laughed. I think I could happily spend the rest of my life making him laugh like that and I would feel like the most successful woman on the planet.

He locked on me with his dark eyes. He moved closer as if he was stalking his prey, tilting my head back and touched my neck with his amazing lips. Just when it was about to get interesting, my cell phone buzzed. I groaned and he chuckled as he moved away. He took the grapes from my hand and went to bond with Rex while I scrambled to find my phone.

"Hello?" I spoke slightly breathlessly.

"Hey, you're improving with that!" Marcus's slightly flat voice came after a slight pause. I laughed and slid up on the kitchen counter.

"Well, it's a lot of work but I do it just for you."

"Aw, how sweet of you! Listen, I know this is probably going to sound incredibly needy of me, but I'm bored out of my mind. You doing anything tonight?" I laughed slightly.

"Just a funeral home showing."

"Uh, a what?"

"You know, the funeral home displays the dead person before burial for the family and friends."

"Oh, I'm so sorry."

"What? Oh, no, I didn't know them."

"And you going?"

"My Grandmother loves these things. There are kind of the social event for the older 'burg people."

"Quaint. Mind if I go?"

"What are you crazy?"

"No, just really tired of staring at the same four walls."

"I'll pick you up in about a half an hour."

"Great. Uh, what do I wear to one of these things?" I laughed and helped him figured something out.

"Men," I said laughing as I hung up. "They get lost in the closet." Ranger quirked an eyebrow at me. I had told Andy to drop by earlier to eat with us so we could catch up. He knocked and walked in just after I got off the phone with Marcus.

"So, are you up for an evening of mayhem and Mazur?" Andy came in and kissed me and handed Ranger a box of takeout from Maggio's. Maggio's was the new family owned restaurant in the 'burg. It opened about six months ago and nearly didn't get off the ground. With a little help from Connie and the rest of us, they threw a party for the 'burg police officers and it was so successful that the family became 'burg over night.

I groaned, but tried to pull on a stiff upper lip. "I think I have to be. Now, Marcus is going with us."

"Marcus?" Andy had the strangest look on his face as he dug through our silverware drawer.

"Yeah, you met him yesterday. Marcus Wright, good looking guy, about Ranger's height, deaf?" Andy tossed me a glare and went and sat down at the table, waiting for Ranger and me to join him.

"I remember him, I just can't figure out why you would be going out with him." I looked between Ranger and Andy, trying to figure out what I missed. Ranger was watching Andy with a blank face and Andy was staring at me, a little bit of color on his cheeks. Why was he getting so worked up?

"What's wrong with Marcus?" I asked softly. Andy rolled his eyes, still not realizing that we were both focused on him.

"He's a pompous playboy with an attitude. I just don't think he is good for you to be around." I was about to argue with his unfair statement when Ranger stuffed a breadstick in my mouth and asked Andy how his day had been. After that, Andy calmed down and told us a few stories about his interesting clientele and how the mayor was dragging his feet on approving a youth center off Stark Street. The three of us chatted easily for a while until I had to leave. I kissed Ranger and waved to Andy, heading for the car.

XxXxXxX

I picked up Grandma Mazur first and told her who would be joining us.

"Oh, good! Is he single?" She had a sly grin on her face.

"Um, I'm not sure. We haven't really discussed that, yet." But I'm pretty sure she would not be his type. Marcus was waiting for us again, just finishing a cigarette.

"Oh, I think it's so sexy when a man smokes." I looked at Grandma trying to figure out what was going on in her head. "Don't you, Stephanie?" She asked as Marcus climbed in.

"It's not a deal breaker." I answered and turned around to Marcus, introducing him to Grandma Mazur. She followed my example and turned around in her seat to talk to him all the way to Johnson's Funeral Parlor. Sounds so innocent, huh? I winced as she asked him all about his sex life and then, about his, uh hem, male parts. He asked her to repeat some things because he hadn't understood the first time and gamely went along. He answered most of her questions and danced around the ones that were too intrusive.

"Have you ever had sex with another man?" Grandma asked, gleeful that someone would satisfy her every curiosity.

"Um…no, but I'm not closed to the possibility."

"Have you ever…"

"Grandma, we're here."

"Oh, darn. It was just getting good." She pouted and got out of the car. She was already intent on her new mission. She leaned back in and faced Marcus. "We'll continue this later." He just nodded seriously and I dropped my head to the steering wheel. Oh, god. Marcus rubbed my back and pulled Star out, waiting for me on the outside.

I got out of the car unwillingly and led Marcus into Johnson's Funeral Parlor. It was a very nice building, with warm wood floors and cream walls decorated by landscapes. We found Grandma Mazur standing by the cookies, chatting with Elda Carmine, a woman that lived about a block over from us. As we were walking closer to Grandma, Marcus was stopped by a very unusual looking man. He was a little on the short side, about half a head shorter than me, and his back was just slightly hunched. He had a rather plain face and a nervous twitch in his cheek.

"Excuse me?" He said to Marcus as we passed him. Marcus hadn't seen him and kept walking. I stopped him and pointed out the young man. "Hello, I haven't seen you around here before." He continued. My jaw almost dropped, he was hitting on Marcus. Right in the middle of the funeral home, he was hitting on a man that could very well be straight. Jeesh.

Marcus hadn't picked up his words but he must have understood from body language. Instead of saying something to the poor boy and embarrassing him, he turned to me and started signing rapid fire. I have no idea what he was saying but his face told me to play along.

"Um, he says that he is here to see his Great-grandmother buried and that it was just such a shock to lose her. He is so grateful to the staff of the parlor for making this as painless as it has been." Marcus stopped and nodded to the shocked man. "We had probably better get into the showing." I noticed Grandma moving toward the doors without us. We nodded to the young man and followed her without another word.

It was crowded inside. I left Marcus at the back and caught up with Grandma Mazur as she headed to the closed casket to pay her last respects to Birdie What's-her-name. "I don't know why it would be a closed casket. She died peacefully in her bed." Grandma mused as we edged closer. "Maybe, we should take a look to make sure she's still in there."

"Grandma, I'm sure Birdie is still in her casket."

"But what if she isn't?"

"It was the family's wish to have her casket closed." Grandma huffed at this. When we came to the casket, she laid her hand on the half that had the head and made a big show about saying goodbye to her "dear friend". Oh, god. She's trying to open the casket. I looked around and tried to shield her from view. The next thing I know, Grandma is shrieking and the casket is tilting off its stand. Oh, God, I am definitely going to hell or at least never getting dessert again. A body spilled out onto the floor and it was not Birdie.

A man with a knife in the center of his chest came to rest at my feet. I bent down to make sure he wasn't still alive with a knife in his heart, got to make sure, people, and read the writing on his jumpsuit.

Morningside Mental Institution.

Uh oh, I think we just found Jack Finney.

XxXxXxX

I sat in Mia Brookline's office sipping on coffee. She had let me take Grandma and Marcus home before coming back in to be questioned.

"How do you always manage to fall into these things?" Her tired voice came from behind me as she led another detective into the room. "This is Detective Donahue. He's homicide and we're working on this together. I'm handling the stolen bodies and he's got the murdered ones." Donahue looked me up and down with a dirty look on his face.

He asked me a few questions then left with a parting leer for both Mia and I.

"That man would make a pass at a corpse if it stood still long enough." Mia shook her head and asked if I was okay.

"Yeah, just wasn't expecting that to happen." Mia leveled a look at me.

"With your life, how can that surprise you?"

"Can you tell me anything about the case?" I looked at her hopefully.

"How about that you stay away from it?"

"C'mon, Mia, Grandma asked me to look into it for her." Mia sighed.

"I shouldn't tell you anything." I begged her with my eyes. "But, something that wasn't released to the press was they hadn't found whole bodies when they search Jack Finney's house. They found pieces missing off of each body."

"Like, cannibalism?"

"No, like a foot here and an arm there. Remind you of a book we read in high school?"

"Oh, god, Frankenstein?" Mia nodded.

"The police haven't found the rest of the body parts, but the ones that were taken were all selected for a reason."

"Eww, that's just wrong."


	10. Chapter 10

The next morning I woke up bleary eyed to my cell ringing.

"M, 'ello?" I am not a morning person and last night was a long night. I squinted my left eye open to check out the time. 7:35. Holy crap!

"Hey, sleepyhead." Andy's singsong tone woke me up a little.

"Whaduwant?" I slurred out.

"Oh, What's that? Oh, love you too, sis!"

"Andy, it's early."

"You still going shopping with Mia this morning?" Crap, I forgot.

"It's Saturday?"

"Well, yesterday was Friday. Unless they changed something, yep."

"Crap, I've got to get up." Mia was an early bird and had a horrendously ugly habit of doing things early. Now, who would have thought that those would go hand in hand?

"Before you crawl out of bed…"

"Oh, right. You needed something?"

"Yeah, I need a costume for Halloween."

"Aren't you a little old for that?" I teased. Ranger tugged me back into bed and nestled his head in my upper back. Hmm…I don't need to get up just yet.

"It's for a costume party…er, actually a masquerade ball."

"You got invited to that, too?" I stiffened a little with surprise and the sleepy Ranger ran his hand down my tummy to sooth me. And to do other things, I'm sure.

"Oh, good. I was afraid that it was a hoax, like an advertisement. I don't know that many people on the East Coast, so…"

"Yeah, Lula and Connie got invitations too."

"You guys know the host?"

"There wasn't a name on it and I didn't recognize the address."

"I googled it and found some history on the mansion but the owner wasn't listed. Must be a very private person."

"Mysterious," I murmured and felt Ranger starting to distract me. "Hang on." To Andy. I turned to Ranger and kissed him. "I have to go get ready."

"It's Saturday."

"Shopping with Mia," I reminded him.

"Right," He started to get up. I pushed him back.

"Sleep in." I kissed him again and slid out of bed. "Still there?" I asked Andy.

"Yep, just getting dressed. So, mind if I tag along?"

"Nah, you have better taste then I do in clothes anyway." He laughed and I closed the phone, slipping into the shower.

XxXxXxX

We met at his SUV. He may be gay, but he likes to drive and I still had to put on makeup so it worked out well. We pulled into the mall parking lot at the same time Mia called.

"Where are you?"

"Miss me already?"

"Actually, I thought you overslept."

"Psh, like I would do that." I mouthed a thank you to Andy. "We're just pulling up to Macy's."

"Oh, good. Meet me in the Baby Gap." She hung up and I stared at the phone.

"What?"

"We're meeting her in Baby Gap."

"Hunh, guess Morelli and her are close." I smacked him and we walked into the mall.

Mia was in the check out when we found her. I gave her a hug and whispered, "Something I don't know?" She pulled back with a frown.

"Oh, you naughty girl." Andy drawled. Mia finally understood and she turned bright red.

"Oh, no, no, no!" She waved her arms. "I'm buying these for a friend." Andy nudged me.

"I thought that was the guy's line."

"Little late for those."

"Oh, God, guys, knock it off! I'm buying these for an old college friend who is pregnant."

"Sure…"

"Andy, shut the hell up." She grabbed her sacks and led the way out with me laughing my butt off. At the food court, we went separate ways to our own food choices. Mia went to some healthy juice stand and Andy and I went to Mickey Ds. I told you, we're just shared souls. We met back up at the tables and looked at each other's food. Our food would have kicked Mia's food's butt. Of course, our food was probably going to kill us too so we didn't say a word.

"I need to find a costume today." Andy and I shared looks at Mia's announcement.

"Really?"

"Yeah, Joe and I got an invitation to this ball thing."

"Us, too. " I pointed a finger between Andy and me.

"Really? I thought it was just a cop thing. I've heard that a bunch of other cops have gotten them, like Gazarra and Costanza."

"Connie and Lula, too."

"No kidding? Wonder what this is about?"

"You're going?" Andy asked.

"Oh, yeah. It sounds great and we don't have any other plans." I got up and threw my trash away. Mia looked at me with a worried look when I sat back down.

"What?"

"Are you sure that it's okay with you that…" She stopped.

"That I'm okay with what?"

"Me and Joe." She shrugged helplessly and looked me in the eye.

"Oh, jeez, Mia, of course, I am." It could be a little awkward at times, but I was happy for them. "I love you both and I'm glad that you're happy together. Besides, Dawn is doing so well with him." Dawn was Mia's little girl. Mia had adopted her when her sister died and she had raised her since.

Mia started to speak when my cell rang. I was relieved that this conversation wasn't going to continue. I frowned when I saw the number. "It's Marcus."

Andy's eyes widened a little. "The deaf guy calls on the phone?" I held up a finger and answered the call.

"Yo."

"Back to yo?"

"Bite me."

"Actually, I would rather not. Um, just curious, but have you seen Andy's car lately?"

"We came to the mall in it, why?"

"Because it just pulled up to my building when I came in from a run."

"You sure that it's Andy's?"

"Same NWU bumper sticker and I'm pretty sure that it's the same license plate. Unless Andy's got a kid sister or he's dating 'um real young these days, I think your little thief was driving it."

"Oh, geez, Mallory. Where is it now?"

"Still parked in front of my building. Star and I are watching it now."

"Is Mallory in it?"

"No, she's in the building."

"Crap, we'll be there in a few minutes. I'll call you back if we find the car before that."

"Got it."

Andy looked at me. "Mallory stole my car?" I sighed.

"Maybe," I turned to Mia and she stood and threw the rest of her food away.

"Let's go."

XxXxXxX

Andy's car wasn't in the parking lot. In Mia's car, Andy sat in the back and Mia was gripping the steering wheel like it has seriously pissed her off and she was trying to kill it.

"So…" Andy searched his mind for something to relieve the silence. "How does a deaf guy use the phone?"

"Is this like a knock, knock joke?" I turned around and asked.

"No, how does Marcus use the phone if he can't hear?"

"Um…the wonders of modern technology?" I shrug.

"You're kidding me."

"What?"

"You're afraid of looking like an idiot in front of him."

"No!"

"Yes, you are. You don't want to ask."

"Maybe." Andy rolled his eyes. He was good at it.

"I'll ask him. How's that, genius?"

"Sounds like you have it under control."

"Glad you have faith in me."

"Yes, Andy. I believe in you…" We had pulled into Marcus's lot and I saw Andy's car.

"There it is."

"Holy smokes, that girl is something else."

"Why did she steal his car?" Mia asked as we got out.

"Maybe she saw us getting out of it at the mall."

"Yeah, remember…this girl kinda hates Steph."

"My first preteen stalker."


	11. Chapter 11

Marcus approached us when we got out of the car. I introduced Mia and they shared a smile and nod thing. Andy stood behind me a little bit and seemed very stiff. I didn't know what his problem was, but I honestly didn't care at this point. If Andy was going to be a jerk about it, whatever. His problem.

"Where is she?" I asked while Mia started checking her gun.

"I think she's somewhere on the third floor. I'm guessing that she's been up there about thirty, forty minutes." Mia nodded and I dug in my purse for my stun gun and checked the charge. It was a little low but it could probably handle this one. Does this sound a little excessive for a twelve year old? Well, at the moment I was considering that maybe she was the spawn of Satan. I dug out my cuffs and stuck them in my hip pocket. Mia and I were ready to go. I nodded to the guys, leaving them to entertain each other.

We silently climbed the stairs to the third floor. I listened as we walked down the hall.

"Mal, what is wrong with you? You led that bitch right to us."

I turned to Mia and pointed at a door about halfway down. She nodded and we moved closer.

"But, Daddy, it wasn't my fault!" Mallory Benedict's teary voice came through the door. Followed by the sharp sound of a slap and a small sob. Mia's hands tighten on her gun and I clinched my hand. I may not like what the girl has done, but I hate when someone hurts a kid.

"If you weren't so stupid and you worked harder, this wouldn't have happened."

"Daddy!" Mallory shouted, followed by a loud crash. I nodded to Mia. We had to go now. Mia stepped back and kicked the door next to the locks, splintering the door open. Damn, that girl has some moves. She moved in and had the gun pointed straight ahead. A man a few inches taller than me was standing over Mallory who was shaking on the floor. He was staring at us in shock.

"You led a cop to me?" His roar had diminished a bit. Suddenly, a man was to the right of the door slammed Mia's arms down, knocking the gun out of her grip. I was still in the hallway, out of sight. I rushed in, slamming into the man from the side.

"Oof." He turned to me, circling in a fighter's pose. This man was a real fighter. I circled with him, keeping me out of his reach. Mia was scrambled on the floor for her gun when Mallory's father kicked her in the nose.

"You bastard!" Mia shouted, falling backwards. Benedict advanced on her. She waited until he got close enough and slammed her Converse high tops in between his gut and his groin. He dropped down. Never underestimate Mia Brookline.

I circled away from the man, waiting for his move. Never make the first move. Martial arts were the most effective when used as a defense. This man didn't have the patience to wait for me. He swung a well aimed punch which I blocked and followed by a high kick to his chest.

He popped my leg down and I naturally retained my balance. We circled. He kicked low to my leg, which I snapped away, blocking his punch. He punched again, bringing his body closer to me. I ducked the punch, set my foot beside his and quickly kneed his thigh over.

He stumbled and fell, with my foot tripping him up. He hit the floor without resistance, kicking out with his foot into the side of my upper thigh. I fell next to him and he rolled on top of me, trapping my legs and one of my hands.

I grabbed the back of his neck with my thumb in front of his ear, cupping the side of his neck with my palm. I pressed with my fingers and rolled his head. Control the head, control the body. He moved off my right side and I kneed upward into the groin. He rolled off and fell to the floor. I roll him quickly to his stomach and cuffed him before he regained his senses.

By the time I looked up, Mia had her gun back and it was pointed at Benedict. She looked back at me and asked if I was alright.

"Peachy."

While she was looking back, Mallory rushed her and slammed her body like a linebacker. Mia kept her gun but in her surprise, she was taken back several feet. Benedict started to run out the door, leaving his daughter like the coward he was.

I roundhouse kicked him into the door frame. See, a roundhouse kick in a close fight leaves you vulnerable, especially if your opponent is more skilled, but it is also an incredibly powerful kick, putting your spin force into it. Benedict slid down, dazed. Brookline quickly had Mallory under control and we walked our three cuffed prisoners down to the car.

I stopped when I saw Andy and Marcus. They were talking like old friends. Andy spoke while he signed and he was a little slower than Marcus's signs but he was defiantly making an effort. Wasn't he just telling me that being friends with Marcus was a bad idea? I shook my head and hauled back Benedict by his cuffs with one hand and held onto Mallory's arm with the other. We led the two men to Mia's car, which was equipped to handle prisoners then I settled Mallory in Andy's SUV, engaging child's locks in the back and locking it up.

"Hey, guys." It was an interesting twist. The women just came back from kicking butt to the men who were chit chatting. Marcus nodded and showed Andy something with his right hand. I frowned at them and Andy grinned at me.

"He's showing me dirty words."

"Of course." What? Are they ten? Mia caught my eye and rolled hers. Boys.

XxXxXxX

We dropped off the three at the police station. It turned out that the mystery man that I fought was wanted for murder and Mallory's father had jumped bail about three weeks ago.

Guess who was in charge of bringing him in?

Jeanne Ellen Burrows.

I thought it was pretty funny, too. All in all, a very tidy bust, except Mia's bloody nose. Luckily for Miles Benedict, it wasn't broken or Mia might have gone in and kicked his butt again. Broken noses didn't fit into her plans.

Andy and I said goodbye to Mia, postponing the shopping until Tuesday because Dawn had an appointment. We were almost home, when I turned to him.

"What was that back there with Marcus?"

"He's a funny guy." Andy shrugged, not taking his eyes off the road.

"Oh? Now, he's funny. Before, he was a pompous jerk with an attitude."

"Okay, I was a bit hasty."

"You're kidding me, right?"

"Oh, I got to play with his phone."

"What sort of euphemism is that?" He smacked my shoulder.

"I got to read what you had said to him."

"Huh?"

"His phone does this thing, it puts what the speaker say into words and he just reads them."

"Sweet, where can I get one of those?"

"I think it's a special attachment. I guess it isn't that cheap."

"Why would he bother?"

"His family is pretty tight and they are all 'hearing'. He just kind of lives in the hearing world and he adjusted to them."

"Interesting. Why did he move away from his family?"

"Actually, it sounded like he is moving closer to them. They live in Staten Island and he didn't want to be too close to them but you know, still see them."

"Sounds like you two had a nice chat." He just smiled and looked to the side at the passing graveyard and shivered. "What?"

"Just, um, thinking." He quirked half a smile. "I'm, uh…Have I told you that I'm necrophobic?"

"Necrophobic? As in, attracted to dead bodies? Like sexually?" I frowned, trying to remember what I had learned about Greek root words. He released a bubble of nervous laughter.

"No, that necrophilia. I am the opposite. I am terrified of death and things that are dead. I hate cemeteries with a passion and I can't stand being near a body."

"But you went to a viewing with Grandma." I pointed out. He shook his head.

"That was different. There was a room full of living, breathing, warm people and I stayed on the other side of the room from the casket. Besides, there wasn't actually a body."

We pulled into the lot and we walked together up to the second floor. He stopped me at the stairwell door to it.

"What are you and Ranger doing tomorrow?"

"I was thinking we would just relax and spend the day together. You?"

"Nothing, I was going to veg out. I was thinking maybe tomorrow night I could come down and we could have a scary night."

"A scary night, huh?" I said with a grin. "How about we make s'mores and…"

"Tell ghost stories." He finished with a grin.

"But wouldn't that be a bit much for you?" I asked, thinking about his admitted fear.

"I like being scared." He smiled and walked on up. I smiled. We will see about that.

* * *

A/N: Do you guys have any scary stories? I have plenty of ideas but I would love to hear some of yours. If it gets to me before I post the next chapter, I might include it.

Thanks for all your wonderful reviews. They really make me want to write. Carolatte has been my go to girl for anything and everything deaf related, so you can thank her for a lot of Marcus. What I've messed up is completely my fault.

As always, I'm not Janet and I don't own Stephanie and her other characters. I do own the plots and my OCs.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: This chapter is basically fluff. There are some plot related discussions, but not many. You won't miss much if fluff isn't your thing. There are also three scary stories told in the middle. If you want to skip those for any reason- they start and end with stars.

* * *

Ranger wasn't home when I came in. There was a note on the counter telling me that he needed to go to work for a few hours and that he would bring dinner. My eyes paused on his sign off. Love, R. Oh, boy. Heat flushed through me. I knew that he loved me in his own way and well, we were kind of living together, but he had written it in such a subconscious way. He really loved me. Before I became a pitiful mess, I went and showered to wash off the sweat residue from the fighting and climbed into my PJs.

I fell back into my thinking position. It had changed when I started sharing my bed on a regular basis. Instead of draping across the whole bed diagonally, I flopped onto my side of the bed and draped myself over onto Ranger's side. I had a mystery to solve, but once again, I had no idea what way to go about figuring it out.

I knew that Jack Finney had been originally charged with stealing bodies from funeral homes and he had spent ten years in a mental institution. He finally managed to escape and more bodies go missing, except he get's killed. How could Jack Finney have stole Birdie if he ended up dead? Maybe he had an accomplice? Some thing nagged my sleepy mind as I dozed off, but what ever it was, it was lost.

I woke up in Ranger's warm arms much later. I rolled onto my side to face him. He smiled sleepily and I kissed him softly. I remembered his note and pulled back a little. He looked so relaxed with me, not losing the edge he had. More like I just saw more of him, instead of different things. I grinned, thinking about the things I wouldn't mind seeing and he kissed me hard, his ESP reading my mind.

He rolled me onto my back, kissing down my neck. He stopped at the neckline of my shirt and lifted it up, not quite pulling it off. His soft lips touched my belly and moved agonizingly slow downward. I lifted my hips impatiently and he grinned up at me. Moving downward, my only thought was that dinner could wait.

XxXxXxX

Late Sunday morning the only thing that drug us out of bed was our grumbling stomachs. As I warmed up the Chinese takeout, Ranger sat at the counter with his laptop, working. Ranger was very street but it is amazing how good he is with a computer. He closed down when the food was ready and we crashed on the couch. I told him about Mallory and taking down the two men and he told me about the emergency at work while we ate. I got off the couch and found a movie. I was dying to watch The Terminator. Like our lives aren't violent enough, right?

We passed the afternoon on the couch taking turns picking movies and arguing good-naturedly about points in the movies.

"John Connor knew that Kyle Reese was his father when he sent him back."

"No, she must have edited the tapes."

"Why wouldn't she have told him?"

"Because John might not have sent him back to his certain death. She even said she might not tell him because of that."

"If she truly loved Kyle that much, she would have told John. That might have saved his life."

"But that's ridiculous. She wouldn't have risked her own life and had given up the future's only resistance just to save the man's life. She was hardened by that point."

Okay, it had been a long week. Neither of us were thinking all that rationally. Besides, dissecting 80s movies with Batman was fun. I would have argued any stupid point just to keep it going.

"Andy is worse than a chick with his mood swings toward Marcus." I murmured as the credits rolled for Reign of Fire. Oh, come on. Christian Bale is a mega hottie.

"He just likes him." Ranger shrugged.

"He acts like he hates him!"

"That's because he just doesn't have confidence in himself."

"And he takes that out on Marcus?"

"Maybe he just thinks Marcus is too good for him and he is trying to make himself not like him."

"How could I have not seen that? He's one of my closest friends."

"Maybe you're just too close to him to see it." Ranger tweaked my nose and jumped up out of the way, grabbing his choice movie. It was called Six Days, Seven Nights and it was hilarious.

We were very relaxed by the time Andy knocked on our door with the makings of chocolaty goodness.

It was getting dark and I got out all the pillows and a few blankets to make a nest on the floor. Ranger grabbed some of my candles and we created mood lighting. I had just planned to roast the marshmallows on the stove, but Andy came up with the brilliant idea of using a big candle with multiple wicks. We settled down and waited for nightfall.

*****

"Who goes first?" Andy asked, as we got comfortable. Ranger and I looked at him. Well, he suggested it. I was a teensy bit nervous about have a spook night with Ranger. Well, I didn't want to look stupid in front of him. Besides, what if he wasn't into this kind of thing? I didn't realize how foolish it was for me to worry.

Andy settled in and started:

"There was once a rich woman who was in search of a husband. She was old and she wasn't a very attractive woman but her wealth attracted many suitors, especially, her golden arm. One man in particular caught her attention and she fell in love with him. They were quickly married and settled into life together.

Now, you see the man was very clever and he knew that old woman wasn't going to live much longer so he just waited. She fell more in love with the charming and attractive young man that was so attentive to her and despite her wealth, she was sure that he loved her, too.

When she died, he was horrified that she wanted to be buried with her golden arm. She had left him everything else, but he had to have that arm, too. When the darkness fell, he went out and dug up his late wife's body and took her beloved golden arm.

He ran back up the stairs to his bed, tucking the golden arm under his pillow. Soon, it was midnight and he was brought out of his fitful sleep by a chilling voice.

"Who stole my golden arm?"

He was sure that he was imagining it.

"Who stole my golden arm?" The voice was at the bottom of the stairs.

He buried his head in his pillow, still sure that he is asleep and dreaming.

"Who stole my golden arm?" Bang, bang, bang. The chilling voice was coming up the stairs.

The man clenched his eyes shut, praying that he would wake up.

"Who stole my golden arm?" The voice was right outside his door. His eyes opened in terror.

"Who stole my golden arm?" The door swung open and there stood his dead wife with a knife raised in one hand. Her other arm was missing.

"Who stole my golden arm?" The chilling voice came out the woman. It moved closer and closer until she stood over his bed.

"You stole my golden arm!" Andy lunged at us and I shrieked.

"Gee, sis, it's just a story." Andy grinned at me and Ranger shook his head.

"My turn," He spoke with a wicked glint in his eyes.

"A lonely rich man was on business in London when he met a charming girl. He was instantly in love with her and he told her so. They were quickly married and he brought her back to his estate. She didn't like the cold house but she tried her best to make it her home. She was given to reading in her bed for hours when the master was away from the house. After a month of marriage, she began to get sick. This was the age of cholera so the husband immediately fetched a doctor.

The doctor couldn't find anything wrong with her and assured the man that she would get well soon, but she didn't. She grew steadily worse until she was completely bedridden. After that, she would never let the chambermaids fluff the pillows or change the bedding because she was too exhausted and their chatter hurt her head badly.

She became deathly ill very quickly after that. The husband again fetched the doctor. Again, the doctor could find nothing wrong with the girl except her symptoms. The next day the girl felt a little better and she went out walking in the gardens with her husband. It was her favorite part of the estate. After their walk, she felt much better but very tired.

She went to sleep early that night. The next morning a maid went in and found the girl dead. The man was so filled with grief all he could do was pace in the next room for hours after her body had been removed. The maid who had found her went in to strip the bed and suddenly screamed. The man rushed in and found the chambermaid deathly pale beside the bed.

"What is it?" The man shouted at her.

"It's very heavy, sir. It startled me." She pointed a trembling hand at the pillow. The man grabbed it and found that indeed, it was very heavy. He carried it to the dining room table and grabbed a knife to slit the pillow open. The staff of the house gathered around the man as he pulled the pillow apart to reveal a giant, bloated spider. The thing waved two tube-like things up at the man.

The spider had been feeding on the woman while she slept. As her condition grew worse, she had rested more and it had feed more until it had killed her."

I shivered with disgust as Ranger finished. I was imagining that spider.

"Ugh," I groaned. They both turned to me. My turn. Let me think…

"Okay, this is an oldie." Andy nodded, already getting in to it. I smiled, I loved a captive audience. I looked at Ranger and found that he was focused on me with the similar intentness as Andy. They were like little boys, loving to be scared.

"Jenny had a date. She was getting ready and trying to figure out what to wear, when a broadcast interrupted her music to inform her that there was an escapee from a nearby insane asylum who had a hook for a hand and was a known killer. She ignored it and selected a dress that was probably too short, but she wanted to look good for her boyfriend. He picked her up on time and they went out to the movies.

After the movies, they drove up to the local lovers' lane. He was happy with the dress and they were really getting into the make out session when an emergency broadcast interrupted their music. It said that the killer had been spotted in the area. The girl suddenly wasn't in the mood and she told her boyfriend that she wanted to go home.

"C'mon, baby. Nothing is going to happen. I won't let anyone get you." He teased her and tried to kiss her again. She pulled away when she heard scratching on her door.

"Please, can we just go home?" He rolled his eyes.

"Stop being such a baby."

"Please, I'm scared." He sighed impatiently.

"How about I go out and check it out? If there's nothing there, then…"

"No! I want to go home right now." He stared the car, completely irritated and accelerated out fast, showing her how mad he was. He didn't speak to her all the way home and when he got her home, he went around to open the door for her only out of subconscious manners. He stopped dead outside her door and stared at the handle. The girl waited for him, staring up at his bulging eyes. He lifted up the bloody hook that was stuck in her door handle and she screamed.

The next morning in the papers, she saw that a couple of kids had been murdered not too far from where they had parked."

*****

The guys nodded in approval and we got the marshmallows out to toast over out candles and made gooey s'mores. Until really late, we took turns trying to scare each other and we finally fell asleep, curled up on the living room floor together.

* * *

The stories were: The Golden Arm (or Golden Hand), The Feather Pillow by Horacio Quiroga and The Hook.


	13. Chapter 13

I woke up slowly to Andy faintly groaning. Since I was currently having a dream that Andy was carrying a giant feather pillow around looking for a golden hook this caused me some concern.

"Shut up." Ranger said quietly from somewhere above me and I heard someone getting whacked with a pillow.

Andy tossed a pillow at Ranger and it ended up falling on me. I sat up quickly and batted it away. Hey, I wasn't taking chances…that feather pillow thing was still firmly in my mind. I looked up at Ranger, who was crouching fully dressed in his street gear and then across the room at Andy. Seeing how the blankets were arranged, I'd say that I had used Ranger for a pillow last night.

"Got to go, babe," He quickly kissed my lips and nodded at Andy, then he was off to save the world. Andy stared at him from across the room as he left then turned back to me with a goofy expression.

"Where can I get a Ranger?" I laughed and fell back on Ranger's blanket. Andy crawled over and sat on my thighs. "Please, Mommy, can I have one?" I laughed harder. With his hair sticking up all over the place, he really looked like a kid. He trapped my legs and leaned in and tickled me.

"Andy! Get off me!"

"Not until you say the magic word." He was relentless.

"Um, please!"

"No, abracadabra." He swung off and sat on the floor cross-legged next to me with a huge grin on his face.

"Brat," I sat up.

"You love it. You know, having a camp out on a Sunday night wasn't my brightest idea." I stretched and looked for my cell phone to check the time. 8:28.

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" He rolled back until he was totally slumped against the couch.

"I have a meeting with the mayor and the city board in an hour."

"No pressure."

"I've got to go. Shower, pop energy shots, you know the usual." I waved to him and suddenly I was alone in the apartment. And actually, I enjoyed it. When you've lived alone for as long as I have (ahem, not that long), you learn to love a quiet apartment. I have never had a problem with being alone. I would just bring out my imaginary friends. Some times I was in better company alone then I was in a crowded room.

I got off the floor and got some coffee from the kitchen (Ranger knows me so well). Moving into the bedroom, I pulled out my daily uniform and pulled it on. I did the bathroom things and I was good to go.

Connie and Lula where having an argument about who better-Xena or Buffy. I rolled my eyes and set the donuts down. Both nodded to me and continued.

"Xena would kicked Buffy's blonde little butt all the way back to Valley Girl, California."

"Buffy fights vamps, some bitchy Amazon wouldn't be a problem." I grabbed a Boston Crème and sat on the couch, waiting for the smack down. Finally, Vinnie popped his head out the door and shouted, "I'm paying you to work, not gab." He turned to me. "Why the hell haven't you brought in Mallory Benedict yet? I'm bleeding money here." ("I'd like to see that," Lula muttered beside me.)

I waved the body slip in the air and he huffed, closing the door. I set the two body slips on the desk.

"Good work, Steph."

"Yo, white girl, guess who Connie's going to the ball with?" I quirked an eyebrow at Connie, who was blushing.

"Who?" I finally asked when neither told me.

"That guy that went to checkout the chop shop with you."

"Lester?" Lula cracked up and Connie blushed.

"He came in to pick up files for Ranger and I casually asked."

"She threw herself at him." Connie smacked Lula with my files.

"Did not. Besides, he seemed pretty happy about it."

"He was looking down your shirt and he didn't hear what you said." Lula said gleefully. Connie was too infuriated for words.

"Um, Lester's a good guy." I added, trying to break the silence.

"I don't even know him!" Connie burst out.

"That's why you go on a date with him." I pointed out. Lula seemed to switch sides and she tried to comfort Connie.

"You are going to get yourself a kick ass costume, then there won't be a problem." Connie nodded, her eyes already gleaming with the possibilities. I flipped open the first folder, trying to forget that I hadn't gotten a costume yet. Hey, I've been busy, okay?

"34 year old, male. Arrested for disorderly conduct and indecent exposure. Strange guy, a little creepy. He works at the funeral home. Name's Daniel Wheaton." Connie smoothly supplied. The light bulb clicked on. Looking at the picture, I realized that this was the guy who had hit on Marcus and he must have been the one to hit on Andy. I checked the address. He only lived a street from Johnson's Funeral Parlor.

"What did he do?" I looked up at Connie.

"I guess he was drunk, but no one had seen him drinking. He started whipping it out. You know…mini me." Lula cackled and I hide a grin, putting Dan on the arm rest. I doubted that he would be a problem.

Next up. I flipped open the second folder and I was pleasantly surprised to find Moon-Man. Walter Moon-Man Dunphy had been the class stoner back in school. He was a good guy, but he smoked too much pot and his memory wasn't the best. I usually sat on his couch for a few hours watching TV then took him to the jail for a quick rebond. I had even taken him to his court dates a few times. I laid Mooner's file on top of Daniel Wheaton. All I needed was patience with him, that and a lazy mood.

My last file made me frown a little. Jenna Carter, 27, arrested for assault and battery. I looked up at Connie. "What's up with Jenna Carter?" I didn't recognize the name.

"She's ex military, just got her Honorary Discharge. Came home to find her husband in bed with another woman and got a little mad. He's in the hospital."

"She got a little mad?" Hunh, when I got a little mad, I shouted and argued. When she got a little mad, she put her man in the hospital.

"I get her why?" I asked.

"Low bond. She isn't a flight risk and with her military background, the courts thought it would be excessive to keep her." Lula scoffed and I set it on my pile. I was still groggy so I would deal with her later.

I decided to head to Mooner's. I could use some TV brain drain time.

XxXxXxX

It was 5:50 before I had the motivation to drag Mooner out of the house. We stopped by McDonalds and I bought him three Big Macs. two large fries and a 42 ounce Coke. He chowed down and I stared out the window, occasionally stealing a fry or two. I called ahead and drug Vinnie in to rebail Mooner and then dropped him off and headed home.

I picked up Pino's on the way and met Ranger heading in. He kissed me and took the takeout out of my hands.

"How was your day?" I asked as I straddled a bar stool.

"The guys gave Lester a hard time all morning because he has a big date for Halloween." I laughed and filled him in on the other side of the story. We moved into the living room and turned on the game. I woke up to Ranger carrying me to bed. I smiled and promptly fell back into a dreamless sleep.

XxXxXxX

The next morning, I woke up alone in bed. I stretched and made my way to the kitchen. I was almost out of coffee. I made a quick peanut and olive sandwich and thought about what I needed to do. I still had two skips out, shopping in the afternoon with Mia and Andy and I should check in with Grandma and see if she has heard anything about the missing bodies.

I ate the sandwich and flipped through Daniel Wheaton's file. The background said that his mother had moved with him a lot. She had married and divorced several times before she finally left him at his aunt's somewhere in New York state. Dan's mother had died when he was 19 and he lived at his aunt's house up until she died a few years ago despite their bad relationship. David Johnson, who owned Johnson's Funeral Parlor, was his, until recently, estranged father.

He had no priors and this was a pretty nonviolent crime.

I tucked the files in my purse and headed for Daniel Wheaton's. He lived in a small house with a basement. The dying grass was overgrown and the windows could use some cleaning. I walked up the front steps and knocked on the door. After a long pause, he came to the door. His eyes shifted over me and he became very nervous. I smiled to try to comfort him a little. It didn't work too well.

"Hello, my name is Stephanie and I work for Vincent Plum, your bail bondsman? You missed your court date and I need to take you to get it refiled."

He turned his head to look over his shoulder and he listened for something. He turned back to me. "I'm sorry, now isn't a good time." And he closed the door. Hunh. I knocked again and watched him move back down the hall. Are you kidding me? This little guy was going to give me trouble?

I walked back to my car and sat down. Then, I grabbed my cell and dialed Andy's office.

"Andrew Carson's office, how my I assist you?" Deedra's polite, if preoccupied, response.

"Hey, Dee. How are you doing?"

"Oh, hey girl. It's damn slow today."

"Is Andy busy?"

"No, he just got out of another meeting with the City Board. I think it went well, cuz he's practically bouncing off the walls."

I laughed at the image. "Hey, I need to ask him something. Is he free for the next half an hour or so?"

"Honey, you can have him for an hour."

"Great."

"Here he is. Later, Steph."

I heard the disconnect then Andy picked up.

"You still have your car, right?"

"Sitting in it."

"Guess what? The Board approved my idea for three out of four of the soup kitchens."

"That's great, Andy!"

"Yeah. Oh, did you need something?"

"Um…A little help with a skip?"

"What kind of help?" He turned suspicious.

"He might trust you more than me." I thought about it for a second. "Yeah, and he's probably more attracted to you than me."

"Oh, yeah?" He chuckled.

"Dan Wheaton."

"Who?"

"The assistant from the funeral home."

"Are you kidding me?"

"Nope, remember he liked you?"

"Yeah, and I said that it was creepy and agonizing."

"I'll split the bond with you."

He sighed. "How much?"

"He was bonded for $3,000. I get a 10% cut. $300. You can have half."

"Ooh, a whole $150?"

"How many legal ways can you make $150 in 10 minutes? I'll buy you an early lunch."

"Tacos?"

"Tacos?"

"I'm craving. Fine, give me the address."

I told him and I saw him pulling up behind me fifteen minutes later. We walked the half a block to Dan's house and Andy knocked on the door.

"So, am I telling him your spiel or am I being the dumb neighbor?"

"Tell him the truth."

"Got it." Andy said as Wheaton came to the door. He opened it and he seemed less wary this time.

"Can I help you?" He sounded a whole lot less nervous. Andy turned on his brightest grin.

"Actually, I came to help you. You missed your court date on Friday and I need to take you to get it refiled."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, it can be a real pain if you don't handle this quickly."

"Oh, really?" Like you will get charged as a fugitive, nothing big.

"Uh huh. I can just give you a ride over now if you want."

"Sure, that would be great. Can you give me a sec?"

"Of course. Take your time, Mr. Wheaton." Wheaton left the door open and walked back into his house and grabbed a couple of things.

"You scare me sometimes."

"I know. I scare me sometimes, too."

Dan Wheaton followed Andy like a puppy and I followed Wheaton, just to be safe. He completely ignored me, even as I got it to sit beside Andy. The ride was silent. Andy shifted a few times, uncomfortably because Wheaton's eyes never strayed from him for long. I started to walk Dan into the precinct, but he balked. Andy was leaning against the passenger side car door and Dan Wheaton stared back at him.

Before I could call Andy over to help me, Mad Dog came out the back door for a smoke break.

"Yo, Steph! Need some help with this one?" He took Wheaton when I nodded, I was actually thinking Andy. Wheaton started going crazy when Mad Dogs hands closed on him. "Whoa, boy. Calm down."

I sent Andy a desperate look and he trotted over. As he got closer, Dan calmed. We got him in the police station with Andy leading the way back to the cells and Mad Dog walking beside the prisoner. I trailed. Mad Dog found an empty cell and Dan went into it, very docile. Andy stood next to me as Mad Dog closed the cell. It was only when Andy was walking away that Dan Wheaton started yelling again.

"Don't leave me! Please, don't leave me!"

Andy looked wide eyed at Mad Dog.

"Get out of here, you two. I'll take care of it." He called for the medic on duty and they went back to the cell. I collected my body slip. Andy was already out at the car when I got there.

"That was something." He said softly.

"Let me drive." We switched sides. "Taco Bell?" I asked brightly. Andy just nodded.

"I need some grease after that."


	14. Chapter 14

Andy and I were standing in the Taco Bell line when Mia called.

"Uh oh." I showed Andy the caller ID and flipped open my phone.

"Yo."

"I've got to cancel on you, Steph."

"What's up?"

"There's an afternoon viewing at Johnson's Funeral Parlor. He requested this morning that we have some plain clothed cops there. I want to be there, just in case."

"Good idea. Mind if I tag along?"

"Sure. How about I pick you up? Where are you at?"

"Eating with Andy. Taco Bell."

She made a disgusted sound. "I'm guessing that you two aren't eating anything healthy."

"There's healthy food at Taco Bell?"

"Only if you search for it. I'll pick you up in a half an hour."

"You sure you don't want to eat with us?"

"Gag me with a spoon, Steph." I laughed and filled Andy in.

"They're still going to have those? I mean, they aren't doing too well keeping the bodies."

"The 'burg is the 'burg. Showings are a must."

We got our food and went to a booth.

"Don't you think something is strange about this case?" He asked me.

"You mean, besides the missing corpses?"

"Well, yeah. Your prime suspect is dead."

"Our only suspect."

"Someone murdered Jack Finney. What if Jack Finney was telling the truth when he said that he was innocent?"

"You think the original body snatcher is still out there."

"Could be." We sat back and finished our tacos.

"What bothers me is, why haven't they caught on to the missing bodies before?"

I shrug. "If they keep the caskets closed, then who would know?"

"Uh…wouldn't it be lighter?"

"Filled with rocks or something?"

"Maybe. That means it has to be an inside job somewhere." Andy was deep in thought when Mia walked into the Taco Bell.

"Um, I think you have some grease here." She gestured across her face looking at Andy. As she slid in next to me, he covertly looked at me and I shook my head slightly.

"Sure, Brookline. How's that stick up your-"

"Fine, thank you. Ready to go?" She looked at me.

"Sure, can you throw this away for me?" I handed her my trash and she took it with a roll of her eyes.

"Play nice."

"She started it." He spoke in a childish voice. I cracked up and Mia looked at us weird when she returned.

"Well, darlings, have fun hunting for crazy people. I'll just be getting back to the daily grind." He flipped a wave and headed out before us.

"I think he gets stranger every time I see him."

"You just get to know him better." I shrugged and led the way to her car.

XxXxXxX

The funeral home was packed for the afternoon viewing.

"I guess crime is good for business."

"Don't say that too loud, you might start a riot." As Mia spoke, I spotted Grandma Mazur. She waved and I walked closer.

"So, you used to be Nicole Burch…" Grandma looked Mia over. "Why did you change your name?"

"My adopted parents gave it to me." She stepped into Grandma's open arms.

"Good reason. I'm here to see if anyone else comes up missing." She spoke to me and gave a little wiggle.

"Who's here?" I tried to find a polite way to ask, 'Who's going to get stolen?'

"Oh, it was Jeanne Anderson's little girl. She had a heart attack." Jeanne Anderson's little girl was Marie and she was actually 58, but who keeps track in the 'burg?

Grandma led the way into the viewing room and Mia went off to the side. I followed Grandma up in the line to the coffin.

"That friend of yours. The deaf one with a really good body. How is he?"

"He's good. He helped me find a skip actually."

"Good, good. I knew he had potential. And how's Andy?"

"Still Andy."

"Is he still single?"

I looked at her sideways. "Yes."

"I thought he was the smart one."

"Too smart."

"Ah." We reached the closed coffin.

"Excuse me, excuse me, please." I looked behind me at the young man trying to move through the crowd to the coffin. He was tall and lean with wire rim glasses. "Excuse me, I need to get up to the coffin."

"That was Marie Anderson's youngest." She murmured to me then stepped forward and started shouting for them to let him through. Grandma Mazur is a surprising woman and the sight of this tiny old woman wearing a bright pink running suit trying part a crowd was almost funny. Except everyone listened to her. The man made his way forward, with tears in his eyes.

"I have to see her. I have to make sure it's her." He whispered to her as he walked past.

"Of course, Jeffery."

I saw Mia moving forward through the crowd, either to stop him or to see what was inside the coffin. I turned with Grandma Mazur and watched.

"Excuse me, young man but that is a closed casket for a reason." A burly cop stopped Jeffery Anderson before he got to the casket.

"Please! I just have to make sure."

"Let him do it." I said stepping forward. I had no idea what I was doing but I had to do something.

"Oh, yeah? Under whose authority?"

"Mine. Go ahead and open the casket." Mia stepped beside me and flashed her badge. Jeffery stepped forward without confirmation from the other cop.

A gasp rang out through the crowd when he lifted the lid. Instead of Marie Anderson's body, David Johnson lay in the coffin. And he wasn't moving.

"Shit," Mia hissed beside me.

XxXxXxX

When I finally made it out of the funeral home, I walked to my car that I had left a few blocks down the street that morning. It was Tuesday and I had class with Lula and Andy. I checked my cell phone for the time and stepped up the pace. I really wasn't in the mood for Tae Kwon Do tonight.

All thoughts flew out of my head when I saw my brand new car. Written in red across the windshield was 'Die!' and sitting on my hood was a head. No joke. My heart freaking stopped when I saw that. I moved closer and saw that is was an older woman. All my tires were slashed. My baby wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

"Damn." I said as I opened my cell. My first call was to Ranger.

"Yo," His ordinary greeting.

"Hey, I have a problem."

"Oh?"

"All my tires are flat and I think someone doesn't like me."

"Where are you?"

"Down the street from the funeral home."

"I'll be there in a minute." He hung up. I was shaking a little when I called Mia.

"What?" She answered her phone. Could she be stressed? Hmm…

"I think I found part of Marie Anderson."

"Where?"

"On my car."


	15. Chapter 15

Ranger and Mia got there at the same time. Mia scowled at him and Ranger came to me. He stood next to my side and looked at the car, not saying a word. She just accepted him for the moment and went to work on examining the scene.

"Have you had any threats lately?" She asked in a business-like tone as she dialed a number.

"Besides this?" She allowed a break in her cop face for an eye roll.

"Send me a CSI team and I need a photographer." She spoke into the phone then she gave the address. "Threats?" She reminded me.

"It's been quiet."

"How about you, Mr. Manoso? Has anyone threatened you?"

"Not lately." He said dryly. Mia did a double take, just to make sure she had been insulted.

"Have you been in contact with any dangerous people? How about-"

"Mia, this is us."

She sighed and shook her head. "You don't know anything and you surround yourself with criminals. You know how hard it is to help you?"

I smiled. "I need to get home, Mia. Can you release us from the crime scene?"

"Let me print you." She did her job and Ranger called his seedy, but damn good garage to pick up the car when the police finished. He looked at me as we were getting out of the car at my apartment building. Naturally, he found an amazing parking spot close to the building. I would normally park in the back, next to the dumpsters.

"I'm not going to Haywood." I answered his unspoken thought. "I have survived plenty of stalkers here, I'm not leaving."

"Okay, babe." I looked at him in surprise. That was easy, even for him.

"What's the catch?"

"Keep a bodyguard with you."

I almost argued, but then I remembered Jenna Carter. One of Ranger's big, bulky guys could come in real handy with Military Barbie.

"Deal."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Who's the skip?" I laughed and led the way to the door. Ranger took my keys from me and did a quick walk through. When he returned unharmed, I walked in and dropped my stuff by the door. I needed sleep bad. Ranger made a few phone calls, probably informing the Justice League of the few snags his girlfriend had stirred up and I slipped into a baggy t-shirt and girl boxer shorts. I was curled up on the bed when I heard Ranger moving around, locking up the door and checking the windows. He curled up behind me and just held me as I fell asleep.

I was almost asleep when I mumbled half to myself. "Someone wants me dead."

"Not gonna happen, babe." He squeezed my waist. I drifted off to sleep feeling completely safe.

XxXxXxX

I rolled out of bed pretty late, even for me. I was headed to the kitchen when voices stopped me. Tiptoeing closer, I could make out what they were saying.

"How long have you known Steph and Ranger?" It was Andy.

"Stephanie, well, I've known about her longer than I've known her, you know?" Lester chuckled. "I guess I met her about a year or so ago. She was having trouble making ends meet and Ranger had her tag along on a 'redecorating' job. Oh, man, you should have seen her! She wore a pink scarf, at least, I think she did. She had no clue what she was doing and I think what we did scared the hell out of her."

"What did you do?"

"Evicted some low lifes. She just didn't know what to expect. Got to give her credit, though, she hid it pretty damn well. I don't know how many woman could still be around us, knowing what she knows, but she acts like its no big thing. Maybe for her, it isn't. I mean, how long has she been around Ranger?"

"How did they meet? She never explained that. I mean, it seems strange, doesn't it? A girl from the 'burg being that tight with a guy like Ranger."

"From the outside, maybe, but come on, man. You've seen how they are together. It's just who they are."

"But how did they meet?"

"Ah, yeah, that's a good question. From what I've heard, she got the whole bounty hunter gig and had no clue what she was doing. She somehow managed to find Joe Morelli, her first skip, when none of the Trenton PD could or the other bounty hunter on the case. And then, she let him walk away."

"You kidding?" They laughed.

"She didn't have a gun. Or cuffs. She had nothing to stop him with. So she goes to Connie and tells her that she needs some help. The chick didn't know shit about her job. Connie calls Ranger and calls in a big favor. I was actually in the car with him when he got the call. He was different back then, you know? I think Steph has changed him more than he's changed Steph. He was quieter, untouchable. He was a good guy, but damn, you didn't mess around with shit around him. He got the call and I saw more expression on his face than I think I ever had before that. Course, I was a newbie, so what did I know?

"He got the call and he just rolled his eyes. He didn't like some young blood bounty hunter trying to get herself killed. Tank dropped him off and he pretty much told him that he was going to blow the chick off, maybe get her to reevaluate her life choices. Next thing I hear, he takes her under his freaking wing and he drops everything to help her. I don't know what she did, but she gave him some kind of impression. Personally, I like her. She's good for morale. She would probably hate to hear me say that, but then again, she probable doesn't understand what that means."

"What does it mean?"

"Oh, c'mon, you know. She's bright, she's weird and smart and she gets into the craziest shit. She's different. She does everything different from us, you know, the professionals? And she still gets her man, every time. I don't know, she just never disappoints."

"How long was that?"

"That Steph came into the picture? It's been a few years. I met Ranger when I was on the streets. See, his guys are mostly either ex military or old criminals. I come from the criminal element. Born and raised on the streets. It was a freakin' tough life and I was real sick of it when Ranger and Tank did a bust in my area. That was back before Rangeman, Ranger's company, you know?, wasn't very big. He needed some local talent to help with the take down and I got involved there. I guess he saw something in me too because he offered me a job and a plane ticket to the East Coast. I took it and never looked back."

"Where you from, Lester?"

"San Diego."

"Ever see your family anymore?"

"Everyday. The guys at Rangeman, they're my family. Yeah, it sounds sappy but they've always had my back. They have been there in the good times and through the worst shit and they get me. How many families can really claim that? The family I was born into sure as hell never did that."

The guys fell quiet after that. I heard one of them stand and walk over to the coffee pot. Now would be a good time to make my entrance, I decided. I was trying not to think too much about what I had just heard. I would think about that later, but right now, I needed to be able to act convincing.

I stretched and yawned, padding into the kitchen. "Hey, guys."

"Morning, sis." Andy nodded to me. He finished filling his coffee cup and walked toward me. "I was just waiting for you to get up. I'll, uh, catch you later." He handed me the coffee and kissed my head. "You okay?"

"Working on it." I nodded.

"How about we go shopping tomorrow? I still need my costume."

I nodded, thinking about it. "Sure, we can hit all the stores." Oh c'mon, I know I sound like an idiot, but my mind was a little busy. I had just learned a lot in a very short time.

"Okay, after work?"

"Sure," I nodded again. I feel kinda like a bobble head doll by now.

"You sure you're okay?" He turned around at the door.

"Peachy. Really, I'm okay. I'm just not much of a morning person." I pulled on my biggest smile.

He grinned back and nodded to me. "Good luck today."

After the door closed, I turned back to Lester. "Morning, Les." I padded into the kitchen and sat down across from him. He brought his chair back to the floor.

"Morning, beautiful." I quirked an eyebrow at him. He just waggled his brows back at me. "What's the plan?"

"Find a body snatcher and take down Military Barbie."

"I love working with you."

* * *

I am not JE, just in case you were wondering.


	16. Chapter 16

**We pulled up in front of the address I had given Lester. It was a large house on the edge of the 'burg.**

"**Wonder if she'll keep the house," I mused, looking up at it. It was well taken care of and even to my untrained, ungirly eye, it was beautiful. Lester shrugged beside me.**

"**You think she will really leave the guy?"**

"**Who knows? I did, but everyone's different." We nodded, thinking about women that stayed with stupid, cheating men. I took a deep breath and opened my door. Lester followed me up the front walk and I pressed the door bell. The door swung open to a young boy. He was around ten. I was thrown for a loop. Carter had a ten year old kid?**

"**Yeah?" The kid asked. He looked me over then he looked behind me to Lester. The kid had Jenna's complexion, a very light brown. They looked like the ancient Egyptians that I had been so fascinated with as a kid. Golden, almost. Very exotic compared to my own pale, Hungarian complexion. **

"**I'm looking for Jenna Carter, is she here?" I leaned down a little, unconsciously trying to be less threatening.**

"**Who's asking?" He demanded. I noticed that he has a hand behind his back. Hmm…**

"**My name is Stephanie Plum and I need to speak with her about some of her personal business." Evidently, he didn't like my answer. He brought his hand around and I was faced with a spray paint can. He sprayed down my face to my chest.**

"**Get her!" He shouted. Three other older kids came out of the woodwork from somewhere. One looked like he could be the first kid's older brother. Two had squirt guns and the third had a gun with a long muzzle. The two with squirt guns shot first. Guess what? It wasn't water in there.**

**Orange and green paint hit me at the same time. Lester was getting some too. "C'mon!" He grabbed the arm not blocking my face. I followed him out, but the brats were relentless. They splattered my head and back. Then the third boy got into it. He shot the first paintball at my leg then started moving up. Those things freaking hurt. We finally got to the safety of the car, covered in paint and those brats followed us out. They were creaming Lester's car. He quickly got the car in gear and accelerated out of the war zone.**

"**Well, boss?" I looked at Lester. He was covered in orange paint and his once black shirt was lime green. I couldn't help it, I laughed. He looked at me like I was insane. "You know, you're just as bad as me." He flipped down the mirror. I nearly shrieked. That was an understatement.**

"**Take me home. I have to wash this crap out."**

"**Yes, boss."**

"**Lester?"**

"**Yes, boss?"**

"**Call me boss one more time and I'll send you back to those kids."**

**He grinned. "Yes, boss."**

**XxXxXxX**

**There are potholes all over Trenton. Most of the roads need fixed and there are still a few dirt streets left in the city limits. No joke. Road work is a thing that is rare in Trenton. Yeah, our mayor sucks. I have no idea why he's reelected every year. It's probably mafia related.**

**So with our lack of street upkeep, the natural assumption is the road construction would be a rare and unusual thing. You're completely right, it is. That's what makes it so mind blowing that we were stuck in traffic for an hour. An hour. I have tie dyed hair and I couldn't wash it for an hour. **

**When we finally got back to my apartment building, I sent Lester home to wash up and I ran up to my apartment. I was stiff and my hair was totally dry. I nearly sobbed when I got in the shower. I made a discovery about paint pretty fast after that. If its oil based, it water doesn't affect it too much. I scrubbed my body and hair until I turned pink then got out to see if I had accomplished anything. I showered four times and let the water run until it got cold each time and I was still multicolored. By the time Ranger got home, I was hysterical. **

**Halloween was the day after tomorrow, I didn't have a costume and now, I was orange and green. **

"**Babe?" Ranger said outside the door.**

"**Go away." Yes, I sound like a child but I was not going to let Ranger see me like this. He was Batman, he was the wizard, the shit, the wind. He was the bad ass bounty hunter and the guy that had seen me mess up a thousand times. He was not going to see me with matted orange hair. That was just too far. **

"**Let me in, babe."**

"**No, just leave." I cried. I'm a tough girl, that's just me. I don't cry often and I don't cry in front of the men that I am involved with. It's just my natural defenses kicking in there. But this was just the last freaking straw. I felt like a loser. Ranger jiggled the lock and did his magic thing and suddenly the door was unlocked. I knew it and he knew it. But he left it closed, waiting for me to open it for him.**

**I sighed, stood and wrapped the towel tighter around me and opened the door. Ranger was leaning against the door frame, looking me over. His eyes darkened and he looked me up and down. I laughed, you're kidding me right? He thinks this is sexy? I felt like a clown.**

"**Got anything for paint?"**

**He held up a paper sack from a hardware store. I raised my eyebrows. He pushed my back in the room and sat me on the toilet. He grabbed a wash cloth and pulled out a tin jug from the bag. Over the sink, he fix the rag up and kneeled down in front of me.**

"**Close your eyes." I obeyed. He gently rubbed the cloth over my face. It had a strong chemical smell, but it wasn't totally unpleasant. After a few moments of rubbing, he told me to look in the mirror. My jaw dropped. My face was completely clean. My hair and chest were still covered, but my face was pale and clean.**

"**What is that stuff?"**

"**Turpentine."**

**Who would have thought? The Man of Mystery is handy, too. He helped me clean my hair, then sent me to shower with a kiss. When I got out, he was fixing a salad to go with the subs he got from Pino's.**

"**You're a genius." He chuckled at me awed response. **

"**Good to know," He leaned down and kissed me. I sat and watched him move around. I had learned nothing today, but I felt different somehow. More secure in myself and in him.**

"**I need to find Jenna."**

"**I think I know where you can find her."**

"**Oh, yeah?"**

"**I'll send Tank with you tomorrow."**

**I nodded and grabbed my sub. We ate at the counter.**

"**Did you find anything out about the head?"**

"**Mia called in the middle of my breakdown. It was Marie Anderson. The red wasn't blood. It was some kind of dye," I frowned. "that's used on the bodies."**

"**So it was someone who works around dead bodies." I nodded.**

"**Andy thinks its probably someone on the inside."**

"**Good chance."**

"**How's Lester?"**

"**Colorful. I haven't heard that much cussing since basics."**

**I laughed. "I think my clothes are ruined."**

"**Shopping?"**

"**Tomorrow with Andy."**

**XxXxXxX**

**Just before I fell asleep curled up with Ranger, something nudged my memory. Before I could retrieve it, I slipped in to my dreams.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Ranger started moving. I was pulled out of the strange dream I was having to open my eyes in a dark room. I rolled to my side, watching Ranger get dressed. **

"**Ranger?"**

"**It's early, babe."**

"**No kidding, where are you going?"**

**He kissed my head. "Tank's here."**

"**And you're going to work." He flashed me a grin. I leaned up to see the alarm clock. "For crissake, Ranger! It's 5:30." **

"**Go back to sleep." He kissed me and left. I didn't hear the two men speak to each other, they could probably read each others mind. Where's the fun in talking? Then, the apartment door closed. I tried to go back to sleep, but it was impossible. I crawled out of bed and padded into the living room to find Tank looking over one of my files. I gave him a finger wave and walked into the kitchen, fixing up two cups of coffee. **

**Heading back into the living room, I held the mug in front of Tank and he just smiled before taking it. I glanced at the file and found that he was reading the info on Jenna Carter.**

"**You have any ideas with her?" His only response was a nod. He's keeping this one pretty close to his chest. I sighed and flipped on the TV. I found some old cartoons and we sat and watched _Top Cat_ and _Tom and Jerry_ for a few hours. I looked up after my mental nap and Tank was absorbed in the antics of _Scooby Doo_ and the mystery solving teenagers. I smirked. The big guy likes Scooby? Aw, how cute…**

**I stood up and stretched. Tank immediately took his eyes off the TV and back on the closed file. I grinned and walked to the bedroom, shaking my head. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw that he was back to the classic TV show.**

**Hmm…What to wear when taking on a woman like Jenna Carter? I pulled out my oldest, rattiest jeans and a tank top that has definitely seen better days. Sexy? No. Practical? Heck, yes. Especially if those brats are around. I pulled on one of Ranger's black hoodies and thick-soled work boots. **

**I was good to go.**

**Tank drove in his own version of the "Zone" that those military guys are so famous for. We left Trenton proper and drove out to one of the distant suburbs. We drove down one of the streets and I realized that we must be close to the street that Ranger had pointed out one time, telling me that he had grown up there. The suburb was tidy and reminded me strongly of the 'burg. Tank stopped in front of a beautifully kept large house. It looked homey and comfortable, like the family had lived there for thirty years. He looked at it for a long beat then got out. I followed him up the walk and rang the doorbell. An older woman with Jenna's dark golden complexion came to the door. She looked up at Tank and gasped in surprise. **

"**Oh, dear, how are you?" She sounded so happy. She gave Tank a big hug and pulled back with a grin at me. "Are you-"**

"**This is Stephanie." Tank said quietly. The woman's smile never faltered. She gave me a tight squeeze. **

"**Come on in, honey." She gestured to me. Tank followed me. Just in case you thought I had fallen into the Twilight Zone with Tank, don't worry, I'm just as lost as you. I had never been treated like this by the family of one of my skips. I'm assuming that this is Jenna's mother and I wasn't disappointed.**

"**Jenna, honey, Stephanie Plum is here." She called up the stairs and she sat us down in the living room. "I'll just get you something to drink." **

**I nodded in slight shock. The little boys from yesterday came in the room, herded by the woman. "What do you have to say?" The woman asked in a stern voice. Both boys apologized at the same time, fidgeting.**

"**They get it from their sister, you know? They're trying to be big and bad, but all they end up doing is looking immature and foolish, isn't that right boys?" They nodded and she shooed them away. She handed me a drink and sat down in the chair next to me. I looked from her to Tank.**

"**You haven't told her?" Jenna's mother said softly, glaring slightly at Tank. The big man looked a little uncomfortable under the small woman's gaze.**

**We were interrupted by a footsteps. Jenna appeared in the doorway. She leaned against it and looked me up and down, then her cool green cat eyes settled on Tank.**

"**Pierre?" She stood up straight, looking Tank dead in the eye. What the hell? Tank stood and walked to her. He stood half a foot over her already tall frame. She was, I'm guessing, about 5'9 or 5'10. She looked him in the eye, both very serious. Suddenly, she grinned and threw her arms around him. He hugged her back and swung her a little. My jaw dropped. When Jenna was back on her feet, she turned to me with a huge grin on her face.**

"**My, he really hasn't told you." I nodded, completely out of the loop. She turned back to Tank. "Carlos is an idiot." **

"**Oh, dear, you can't say that. You don't understand the situation."**

"**Has he told her anything?" Jenna just kind of tossed this out. I bristled a little. I guess, I didn't like being told I didn't know my boyfriend by my skip. I know this is irrational, but I didn't really care.**

"**Why don't you tell me what you think is important?" I challenged, standing up. Okay, in my head, that sounded cooler. Jenna looked me over.**

"**Pierre is my brother." I looked between them. Jenna and the others were black, but Tank was many shades darker than the rest. Where Jenna had her mother's soft green eyes, Tank had dark brown. He looked nothing like the rest of the family. Jenna smiled when she saw my confusion. "He's my adopted brother. Mom and Papa adopted him when he was ten and I was six." **

"**Oh, right." **

"**Carlos grew up a block over and we all went to the same school. On this oaf's first day of school, he picked a fight with him. Neither of them won, but they became the best of friends. He nicknamed him Tank right away because he was sure that Tank would always be fighting kids with a name like Pierre. Carlos was the brains of the two and Tank was muscle and I," She grinned. "I was the mouth, the tagalong. The boys put up with it pretty well, considering that they thought girls were yucky and all. When we got older, they would cream any guy that messed with me that I didn't want to and most of them that I wanted to. My big brothers." She sighed.**

"**They joined up before they graduated. Army, of course. Rangers, eventually. I joined up later to rebel against my parents and I went Marines to rebel against Carlos and Tank."**

"**And we've never forgiven you." Tank added with a grin. He had sat back down beside his mother. I was still standing in front of Jenna. **

"**I haven't seen either of these two for years. Not since I got married to the Jack Ass. But I hear a lot."**

**I grinned. "I call my ex the Dick." Jenna laughed.**

"**So what do I have to do to get this cleared up?"**

"**I have to take you back to jail. I can get Vinnie to rebond you, but you might have to wait." She nodded, grabbing her jacket from the back of the couch. **

"**Let's get this over with. Afterwards, you have to let me buy you lunch. I'll tell you all the stories that will be sure to ward you off instantly…that is, unless you actually love that bonehead."**

**XxXxXxX**

**After the police department, Tank dropped us off at Maggio's and was commanded not to tell Ranger a word about it. We sat at a table, at first eating, then just talking. She told me quite a bit about dastardly duo. Ranger had always been quiet, not shy but quiet. He wasn't afraid of confrontation but he became amazingly good at avoiding it. He could charm the teachers into forgetting about homework and make bullies run away with their tail tucked in. And Tank, well, Tank had always been there with him. She told me about herself, too. She had been a Marine, after all. There was a lot to tell. I had to cut it short when I saw the time. It was 5:30 and I had shopping Andy. I pulled out my cell to call Tank for a ride when it rang. I jumped a foot.**

"**Jesus."**

**Jenna almost fell out of her seat laughing. It was Marcus.**

"**Hey." Pause.**

"**Same to you, cookie. What are you doing tonight?"**

"**Shopping with Andy. I need a Halloween costume."**

"**What a coincidence! I need to go shopping to buy my sister a gift for her birthday."**

"**When's her birthday?"**

"**Saturday."**

"**Cutting it close?"**

"**I just remembered…and I'm not sure what to get her? I could use a woman's opinion?" He was doing that almost begging thing.**

"**Alright," I sighed. "Meet me at my apartment building."**

"**Where are you?"**

"**Maggio's, waiting for my ride."**

"**Be right there." He hung up. I looked at Jenna.**

"**My friend is set on picking me up, I think it is to make sure I don't pull a slip on him."**

"**Go ahead, I'll get a ride home from Tank."**

"**You don't mind?"**

"**Not at all." She followed me out and called Tank. We just had to smile when Marcus pulled up. Marcus was a crazy driver. He deserved every ticket he had gotten. We jumped back and he rolled down the window. **

"**Sorry, Ladies!" I shook my head and ran around the Jeep. Waving to Jenna, we were off, speeding toward home. I was pressed to my seat most of the way and we made it there in record time, skidding into the parking lot and slamming to a stop. My liver switched places with my stomach. On the way to the building, I touched his arm.**

"**Where did you learn to drive?"**

"**Mario Andretti."**

**Smart ass.**

**We jogged up the steps and stopped outside Andy's door. I knocked. No answer. Again. Nada. I shook my head at Marcus. He leaned in and twisted the knob. It was unlocked. I led the way into Andy's apartment. The lights were on and his keys were on the table by the door. His sneakers (he wore sneakers with his suits, it just Andy) were kicked off next to couch and he was nowhere in the apartment.**

**We looked at each other. Uh oh. **

**My cell started buzzing. It was a blocked number.**

"**Hello?"**

"**Stephanie Plum." It was the eeriest voice I had ever heard.**

"**Yes? Who's this?"**

"**You have the most beautiful eyes, Stephanie."**

"**Who is this?" I demanded again.**

"**Andy is here with me." Ice shot down my spine.**

"**What have you done to him?" **

"**Oh, nothing. He's meeting my family. I think you should join us, Stephanie."**

"**Where are you? I'll be right over." To kick your butt.**

"**Andy is so scared here, so scared. He's shaking just being here." **

"**Tell me where you are!"**

"**You'll find us. And if you don't, then I guess you have one less friend." He hung up. I stared in shock at my phone.**

"**What? What is it?"**

"**Someone has Andy." **

"**Who?"**

"**I don't know. He said that they were somewhere that Andy was terrified." I looked up at Marcus.**

"**Where would he be scared?"**

"**Um…somewhere he didn't feel safe?" Marcus didn't understand my question. Things started clicking in my head.**

"**The graveyard."**


	18. Chapter 18

**I quickly called Ranger and got his voicemail. I left him a message, telling him everything I knew. Then I called Mia. Her cell phone must have been turned off because it went straight to voice mail. I repeated my message and hung up. I looked up at Marcus. Well. Crap.**

"**We have to go to the graveyard." Marcus just nodded, not questioning my logic.**

"**I'll drive." **

**I just nodded. I didn't tell him that I had no other choice. No car. The thought of my car reminded me of what this guy had done to it. And what he was capable of. That guy had Andy. We got into his Jeep and I buckled up. **

**I got his attention in the growing darkness. "Go fast." He just nodded. And he did.**

**XxXxXxX**

**Riverview was the oldest cemetery in town. I decided to try that. It was the closest to my apartment and it was the closest to Johnson's Funeral Parlor. Marcus stopped on the street and we walked through the gates, our dark clothes were the perfect camouflage in the near darkness. The air was brisk and my cheeks were immediately cold. I wasn't sure where to start so I chose a path at random. **

**We walked around, looking for any sign of life. I saw the crypts and started toward them. Marcus stopped and grabbed my arm. I looked back at him. He pointed to a crypt that was on the edge of the cemetery. Sure enough, there was a strip of light shining out. We walked closer, my hand in his so we didn't lose each other in the darkness. The strip of light came from the door being slightly ajar. We crept up to the slightly open door and peered in.**

**The first thing I saw was Andy tied to an above ground coffin. He sat on the floor with his eyes closed. His mouth was clenched shut and tears were running down his face silently. I almost gasped when I saw why. There were bodies all around him. The missing bodies. More than we realized. Parts were missing off all the bodies. An ear here, a leg there. I nearly gagged. I turned my head to look at Marcus and I saw the man standing behind us.**

**This time I did scream. The man was in the darkness and I couldn't make out anything about him besides his outline. In his outstretched hand was a huge knife. Marcus turned with me and jumped when he saw the same shape.**

"**I think now would be a good time to join Andy." The eerily voice from the phone was mixed with a more familiar voice this time. Marcus and I backed up until we were in the crypt with Andy. He looked up as I looked over my shoulder. I tried a shaky smile and turned back to the man holding a knife in the shadows. He stepped forward and I gasped. Dan Wheaton swung the knife at us and we jumped out of the way. "Sit." He told us and we followed his command. I sat on one side of Andy and Marcus sat on the other. The three of us pressed as close as we could to comfort Andy.**

"**Luke and Leia." I murmured in his ear. He tried to nod. This was just too much for him. **

**Wheaton stood over the coffin above us. The lid had been slid partially off to reveal whosever body was in there. He leaned in, adjusting something. **

"**Mother was so beautiful. You can't see it now, of course, she's let herself go so much. But that's okay, isn't it, Mother? We're working on fixing that right up." He was speaking so normally. I shivered. It was just too creepy for me. I looked up at him.**

"**You killed your own father." **

**He laughed, dully. "That man wasn't much of a father. He ignored me most of my life. He only took me in when he found out he could use me. Of course, I used him right back, so I guess we're even, aren't we?" He hummed a little and reached into the coffin.**

"**Life was so good when I was with you." He murmured lovingly to the corpse. "You made everything magic, even when you would marry those nasty men. Why wasn't I enough? Now, I've finally found someone for you. Then, you can come back and be here just for me. He can be here for both of us. Just the three of us. "He smiled softly and whispered it again. I looked at my companions. Andy was desperately trying to stay calm and Marcus was totally intent on helping Andy. I was the only one of us that could hear Wheaton.**

"**Why Andy?" I asked him. I was trying to keep him somewhat in the moment. My biggest fear right now was that he would lose the last of his sanity while we were still here. "Why did you take Andy?"**

"**He's so much like Mother. I could sense it in his soul. He was so beautiful, so kind. I thought maybe he could finally be the man that Mother needed." He frowned, softly. "I need him. I need him to bring her back."**

**Oh, damn, this was not going how I wanted it to.**

"**Why did you kill Jack Finney?" I asked him, grabbing Andy's hand. Andy was shaking so badly. It scared me to feel his terror.**

"**That foolish old man. He would have been okay, if he had just stayed where he was. Everything would have been okay, but no, he had to try to stop me. The fool." Wheaton's voice had risen in rage, and then he calmed and began stroking whatever was in the coffin. "You know, Stephanie? You have the same eyes as Mother. That's the last part I need. Her beautiful eyes." I shuttered and Andy squeezed my hand. I looked at him. His eyes were beginning to clear, as if he was coming out of it. I squeezed his hand back. Marcus had his other hand. I looked across to the other man. He nodded to me and I nodded back. We were in this together.**

"**How did Finney get caught the first time?"**

"**That bitch, of course. Aunt Bernice. She never was as good as Mother. She hated her and she hated me. That bitch ruins everything! Except, she was too stupid to understand. I was trying to bring her sister back. That's all. She found the body and she thought it was Poppa. She thought Poppa was killing people. And so, Poppa went away. That bitch sent Poppa away." It clicked in my mind. He had lived with Jack Finney's daughter. Jack Finney was blamed for his grandson's crimes. "I had to destroy that last body. It was corrupt. Mother didn't like it. But this one, this one's better."**

"**Why did you trash my car?" I looked up at him and he was looking off in the distance. He couldn't hear me anymore.**

"**Everything is going to be okay now. It's going to work this time. I have someone Mother will like." He nodded, and then looked down at Andy. "I want to show you Mother. She isn't ready yet, but she will be." He leaned down and cut Andy loose. He drug Andy up, ripping his hands out of ours. I started to stand, but Wheaton pointed his knife at me. **

"**Stay right there, Stephanie. This is something only he can see. You can't take him from me this time." Andy looked at us wildly. I looked at Marcus then pointed my chin up at the coffin lid. It was just above him. He looked up then nodded. I crawled closer to the end, where Andy and Dan Wheaton were standing. Andy saw me, then started sobbing. **

"**Let me go! Please, just let me go!" He fought with Wheaton until I was behind him. I touched his leg and he stopped. **

"**That's better. See, isn't she beautiful?" The crazy bastard leaned over the casket and Andy winced at the sight.**

"**Gorgeous."**

"**Oh, I knew you were perfect! I'm so happy that you will join our family! You and Mother can love each other, then you will be my father! Doesn't that sound great?"**

"**Yeah, can't wait." Andy said through clenched teeth. I looked at Marcus, he nodded. He was ready. I looked up. The knife was in Wheaton's far hand, away from Andy. Andy was trying to edge away. Wheaton had let him go. I stood up behind them and shoved Wheaton and he lost his footing, falling forward. He landed on the corpse of his mother and Marcus shoved the lid into place. **

"**Oh, god." Andy grabbed me and wrapped me in a fierce hug. "Holy hell, Steph, I thought we were going to die." **

**I hugged him back. "Let's get out of here."**

"**I've been waiting all night to hear those words."**


	19. Chapter 19

**Getting close to the end... As always, I'm not Janet. Thanks for reading!**

* * *

**We stepped out of the crypt and I could see flashlights moving around the graveyard. Wheaton must have shut the door. Finding us in the dark cemetery would have been nearly impossible. I started calling to the people and I saw the flashlights bobbing our way. The first person I saw was Ranger. Four beams of light hit the three of us. I saw Ranger and Tank on one side, Mia, and Joe on the other. I walked over to Ranger and looked up at him. His face was hidden in the shadows but I could still feel the tension radiating off him. I moved my hand up to cup his neck and pulled him down for a kiss. Then, I just hugged him and let my tension go. I needed his arms around me to hold me up.**

**"What a night to do this on." I heard Joe remark.**

**"Why?" Mia and I asked at the same time.**

**"It's Devil's Night, babe." Ranger murmured, rubbing my back. **

**"The night that crime is a tradition. All the hoodlums play pranks and vandalize everything they can." Joe added. **

**I looked back over my shoulder, still held against Ranger's chest. Marcus and Andy were still close to the door of the crypt in the light. Andy had Marcus's hand, you know, just to help him out in the dark cemetery.**

**"Daniel Wheaton is in there, with all of his stolen bodies." I nodded and Mia and Joe made their way into the crypt. They had the fun job. We answered the questions that we had to and we finally made our escape late that night.**

**I went home and the only thing on my mind was sleep, but I was too worried about the nightmares. I padded into the kitchen and got some Ben and Jerry's and went and sat on the couch with Ranger. I curled up against him and watched the quiet game until I found my voice.**

**"I met Jenna Carter today."**

**"I thought you would."**

**"There's a lot I don't know about you, isn't there?" I said this so quietly that I wasn't sure he heard me. My eyes stayed on the TV and I jammed the ice cream covered spoon in my mouth to keep myself from jabbering. He moved against me and repositioned us so that he was holding me.**

**"You know me, babe." He whispered in my ear. "The rest are just details." I relaxed against him and I fell into a nightmare free sleep. **

**XxXxXxX**

**I woke up with a start to find myself in bed alone. I swung my legs out and walked to the kitchen. Andy had his head on his arms and I'm pretty sure he was snoring. Ranger was working across from him on the laptop. Someday, I'm going to catch him playing solitaire or something. Then we'll see who the bad ass is. **

**"Morning, guys." I said loud enough to startle Andy awake. I looked over my shoulder at Ranger's smirk and I grinned back. It was noon. Hey, I'm not lazy; I've just had a stressful week. But I was glad to have my best friend back and it was Halloween!**

**I groaned against the counter. I hadn't made it shopping all week. I had no costume. Nothing. Damn.**

**"Babe?" Ranger quirked his eyebrow at me when I sat down.**

**"I don't have a costume. And the ball's tonight. In six hours."**

**Andy groaned, too. "We need to go shopping."**

**"I think I'm just going to have to ride with Andy. Then we can go straight from shopping to the party."**

**Ranger nodded. "I can meet you there."**

**I turned to Andy. "Does that work for you?"**

**"Absolutely. Marcus is going, too."**

**I nodded. Ranger stood up and kissed me. "Call if you need anything, babe."**

**"So, shopping?" Andy asked when Ranger was out the door.**

**"Let's do this."**

**XxXxXxX**

**With Marcus at the wheel, we made it through Pennsylvania in record time. This was good, because we were very late. About ten minutes from the mansion, we stopped in a small town to change at the gas station. I hadn't been able to find Wonder Woman. There was nothing to work with even left in the stores. So, I did what I do best and I got creative. Now that I put the outfit on, I was having some serious doubt. Too late now, I decided and adjusted stuff in the mirror. **

**I walked out of the bathroom and found Marcus. He was the first one done changing. I looked him over from behind and grinned. He looked perfect. Marcus turned to me, his trench coat flaring slightly. He was dressed as Kyle Reese, from the first Terminator. 80s style high top Nikes and all. Trench coat, raggedy jeans, ripped shirt and a fake sawed off shotgun. I laughed and he looked down, confused. He signed 'what?' the same time he said it.**

**"You look hot." He grinned at my admission and gestured for me to turn. **

**"You do too. But who are you?"**

**I smiled. "It's a secret." **

**We both turned to Andy and I nearly fell into Marcus laughing. Andy looked great. Actually, he looked amazing…but he was wearing tights and the immature part of me thought it was hilarious.**

**"Who?" Marcus signed/spoke. I had noticed that he was doing that more and more. I think he was trying to teach us.**

**"You don't know?" Andy turned in a circle and looked expectant. "I'm Robin Hood!" **

**I laughed again and he glared at me. **

**"I take from the rich and give to the poor, don't I?"**

**"Andy, it's perfect. It's just that it's too perfect. You are Robin Hood. And now you're wearing tights."**

**"And you are, dear girl?"**

**"It's a secret."**

**The drive to the mansion was absolutely gorgeous. There were still colorful trees in this part of the state. The rolling hills and the clean air made me happy. I'm a Jersey girl, born and raised, but this state could become my home away from home very easily. We passed under open gates with a sign on top that declared Thompson Manor. The drive up was long and I think we passed an orchard that had a stone fence. Then came the sloping lawns up to the mansion. I hadn't seen a picture of the place and seeing it in the twilight took my breath away.**

**It was huge and sprawling. I have never understood that term until I saw this house. It was enormous and beautiful. We drove up to the door and a valet took to car. We walked up to the door and it was opened by a tall, white haired gentleman. I almost giggled with nerves, because this man looked just like I had always pictured Alfred Pennyworth, Bruce Wayne's butler, as a kid. He smiled and let us in.**

**"May I take your coat, Miss Stephanie?" I allowed him to help me out of it.**

**"Thank you, Mr.-"**

**"It just Pennington, Miss." He gave me a warm smile and he pointed me in the direction I was supposed to go. Somehow, I had gotten separated from the guys. I walked toward the music, admiring the decoration. I know this sounds crazy and I was feeling kinda crazy, but it felt comfortable. It was a cozy mansion. Who would have thought?**

**"Mask, miss?" A woman held a tray of masks. I took a mask that had a stick and I smiled at the woman with a quiet thank you.**

**I was a little overwhelmed when I entered the ballroom. I could recognize everyone I saw and a few I could at least place at Rangeman. I saw Mary Lou and her husband, dancing as Raggedy Ann and Andy. Mia and Joe were sipping champagne and chatting with a few other cops, dressed as pirates. Yeah, like matching Captain Jack Sparrows. Cute, huh? **

**Andy and Marcus were signing to each other in a corner and they were joined by Tank and Lula. Lula was surprisingly subtle as Cleopatra, Queen of the Nile and I'm not sure who Tank was. Maybe a GI Joe? Lester and Connie were dancing to their own beat on the dance floor. Connie was stunning and I giggled when I figured out who she was. She was Betty Boop! Lester was dressed as an old school rapper. He had a clock around his neck and baggy jeans held up by suspenders. What a pair.**

**I looked around, feeling oddly at home. These were my friends. I frowned and looked around for the one person that I was missing. Suddenly, I felt that tingle on my neck.**

**"Diana Prince?" He spoke in a low tone. I turned and looked him over. His hair was pulled back and he was wearing a mouthwatering black tuxedo.**

**"Bruce Wayne." I grinned up at him. He put a hand on the back of my shimmering blue dress and I lifted my mask and kissed him.**

**"Shall we?" He asked and held out his arm. I slid mine through and entered the room with him. We walked over to the four in the corner and Lula hugged me. **

**"Who are you?" She asked as we parted. I grinned and said my usual answer. "Hunh."**

**Mia and Joe walked over, scanning the six of us like the cops that they were. **

**"I still don't know who the host is. It sure is beautiful," Mia looked around. I smiled and nodded.**

**"On my invitation, it said that this was the crème de la crème here." Lula added. **

**"Maybe to someone, this is." Mia said thoughtfully, looking at me.**

**"Want to dance?" Ranger murmured in my ear. I smiled and grabbed his hand. He led me out and we slow danced to several songs. Returning to our group, Ranger offered his hand to Mia and I hid my giggles as she accepted. Any excuse to get him alone and tell him all his faults. I watched her talk and him remain stoic the whole dance.**

**"Odd pair, isn't it?" Joe said beside me. I nodded and we watched them. By the second song, Ranger had spoken a few times and Mia calmed down. When they came back to us, Mia wasn't Ranger's best friend, but she seemed to have a respect for him. **

**"I still don't understand why Daniel Wheaton would kidnap Andy and steal all those bodies." Mia said. Naturally, she was the one to bring up work. Joe rolled his eyes. **

**"He was trying to use him as a father figure. That and he thought all of this would bring his mother back." I replied. **

**"We misunderstood his intentions. I thought the first time I met him that he was hitting on me, but he wasn't sexually interested in me. He was too childlike to think like that. When I thought he was flirting, he was actually just trying to use me as his father."**

**"Isn't it ironic?" We turn to Marcus. "Wheaton chose a guy that was terrified of dead people to "marry" his dead mother."**

**"That and I'm almost ten years younger than him." We fell silent, watching the party around us.**

**"Can I show you something?" Ranger whispered in my ear. I nodded. He led me out and told me that he had found this beautiful place earlier. He led me up a couple of floors and we walked down a hallway to a hidden alcove. When I saw it, I gasped. It was a hidden balcony over a conservatory filled with plants. There was a solid wall of glass in front of us, looking out over the well-lit grounds.**

**"Happy Halloween, babe." I stood against the railing looking down and he stood right behind me. He wrapped an arm around me and leaned down to whisper in my ear.**

**"Welcome to the Batcave."**


	20. Chapter 20

**I stretched out across the couch, relaxing, dozing. It had been about a month since the Halloween party. I spent the night at the mansion with Ranger and the next day, we explored it. It was very old, even for New England. The original structure was built by Sir Dylan Thompson in 1638. It had been added on to over the next 370 years by each new family. Ranger had purchased Thompson Manor from an old woman who had been the last of line of a family that had owned and lived in it for over a century. I never did get him to admit why he bought it at the time, but I understood why he fell in love with it.**

**One of the maids, Estelle, told me all about the estate. The mansion had an upper and a lower ball room, scores of bedrooms, an enormous library that Ranger admitted had come with the estate and floors of unexplored territory. Out of the four and a half floors, we explored two of them. There were three wings and an enormous cellar system underneath. The Conservatory, filled with its plants and wicker chairs, was my favorite room. The gardens were extensive, but obviously with the onset of winter, there wasn't much to see now. There was in fact an apple orchard and a good chunk of forest surrounded Thompson Manor.**

**We only stayed in Pennsylvania for a few days then came back to Trenton. I hadn't told anyone that the party that everyone in the 'burg was raving about was thrown by Carlos Manoso or that Thompson Manor was the Batcave. My lips were sealed, but I have no doubt that Andy knew. He never said anything but I know he knew. He's Andy. You doubt him?**

**Want to know what's crazy? Nothing changed between us. I had finally seen the Batcave and nothing had changed. We still ate takeout together and crashed on the couch together to watch a game or a movie. We went to work, saw friends and I still didn't know every little thing about Ricardo Carlos Manoso. Life went on. I didn't need to know everything right away and I looked forward to learning more about that mysterious man. I knew all I needed to know and I tried to accept that there were things that I may never know. Did I need to know everything? No. Did I want to? Is the Pope Catholic?**

**Andy called me about ten minutes after we unlocked the door. He told me that he needed to talk to me about a few things. Naturally, I couldn't deny him a thing, so I jogged up to his apartment and met him at the door with a hug.**

**"Hey, sis." He held me close. I thought it was sweet until he started tickling me.**

**"Andy!" I pushed off. "Brat."**

**"Hey!" We slumped on the couch.**

**"So…"**

**"I, umm, have been acting pretty strange lately, haven't I?"**

**"No, not at all," Then I started remembering some of those strange things and Andy gave me a doubtful look. "Okay, yeah. Maybe just a little."**

**He sighed. "It's just something has been, uh, bothering me."**

**"Oh?" I was completely confused.**

**"I've got a thing for Marcus." He admitted and winced.**

**I just stared at him waiting.**

**"What?"**

**"Was there more to that or were you just finally realizing what we all knew?"**

**"Was I that obvious?"**

**"Umm…yeah. I think Ranger picked it up right away."**

**"Are you kidding me?"**

**"He's perceptive. It probably saved his life a few times."**

**Andy sagged a little on the couch.**

**"Hey, if it helps, it took me awhile."**

**"Marcus asked me out."**

**"He's gay?" I tried to figure out the likelihood there.**

**"He doesn't confine himself with labels."**

**"Naturally. What does that mean in the real world?"**

**"He's open?" Andy shrugged. I laughed and he joined me.**

**"What did you tell him?"**

**"What do you think?"**

**"So, you're over your insecurity issues?"**

**"I'm working on it."**

**And it was slow work. It was a very slow, easy relationship, but it worked, so I didn't say a word.**

**Jenna Carter was sentenced to three years probation with no jail time and her divorce went through. She kept the house and her ex got to keep his legs. It wasn't written in the settlement, but Jenna wasn't the quiet type. You don't piss off a Marine. Especially one with a family like hers. She legally went back to her maiden name, Hart. We had plans for lunch one of these days…**

**I was almost asleep thinking when the phone rang. I groaned and rolled off the couch. When I finally made it to the phone, I picked up to Mia giggling.**

**"Mia?"**

**"Oh, god, Steph! I had to tell you first. Guess what?" She waited and I realized that I was actually supposed to guess.**

**"Um, the aliens have landed and they want to be friends?"**

**"No, silly! Aw, I can't believe it!"**

**"What, Mia?"**

**"Joe proposed."**

**"Hunh."**

**"Isn't it great?" She didn't sound at all like herself. I'm pretty sure that I wasn't that happy when Joe proposed to me.**

**"That's, uh, great, Mia."**

**"Oh, I've got to go! Angie is making dinner for us and I get to meet Grandma Bella." Good luck with that.**

**"I'm happy for you, Mia." And I totally was. But wasn't this a little fast?**

**"Oh, me too, Steph, me too. Bye, kiddo!" She had to be on crack or something. I hung up and stared at my phone. Wow. The locks tumbled while I was still trying to understand the phone and Ranger walked in bringing food. The man is always welcome when there's food in his arms.**

**He looked at my position on the floor and shook his head with a grin. I rolled up to my feet and followed him out to the kitchen.**

**"Joe popped the question." I said, still a little perplex. They weren't the type of people to rush into anything.**

**"You okay with that, babe?" He looked at me with a slightly blank face. I looked up and grinned to him.**

**"I'm happy for them. And I'm happy for me." I kissed him and he pulled me closer. He tugged me up on to the counter and kissed me deeply. Then he pulled back slightly. He studied my face, looking as if he just got an idea in his own Ranger way. "What?" I asked him, kissing him. He pulled back again with a mega watt grin. He stepped away and grabbed my car keys off the counter. He took my hand and pulled me toward the door.**

**"Ranger? Where are we going?" He opened the door and pulled me out.**

**"I'm gonna teach you how to fly."**

**"How?" I asked perplexed when he hit the down button on the elevator. He kissed me again.**

**"How do you feel about driving very fast?" Then he pulled me onto the elevator.**

**Oh, boy.**

* * *

**A/N: Okay, guys...this is it for me. I hope you liked the story. It was a lot longer than I had planned. Thanks for reading! Thanks for the reviews! I love them, please don't stop.**

I only owned my plot and the OCs. Everything else is Janet's. But you knew that, right?


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